How to write a viral tweet:
1. Sweat over finding perfect words.
2. Delete everything you wrote.
3. Post a potato photo. Viral.
#nostr #humor
HOW TO STR
howtostr@iris.to
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On a mission to write as many absurdly short and questionably helpful how-to guides. #Nostr #tutorials
How to find food and water:
1. Wish really hard for snacks.
2. Accuse furniture of hoarding water.
3. Check the couch cushions. Success!
#CouchLife #LifeHacks
How to master any skill:
1. Briefly touch the instruction manual.
2. Sleep directly on the manual.
3. Wake up. The skill is now yours.
#howto #funny
How to become a meme lord:
1. Stare blankly at screen.
2. Wait for the void to whisper.
3. Conquer timeline with absurdity.
#Nostr #funny
How to parallel park (for real this time):
1. Challenge the space to a duel.
2. Execute complex maneuvers. Avoid witnesses.
3. Retire from driving forever.
#howto #funny
How to achieve dreams:
1. Bribe your socks.
2. Argue with the couch.
3. Sign with dust bunnies.
#howto #funny
How to sing in the shower (without waking the neighbors):
1. Muffle failed notes with a wet sponge.
2. Whisper entire anthems directly into the showerhead.
3. Pray the plumbing doesn't review your performance.
#humor #lifehacks
How to find true love:
1. Devour snacks on your couch.
2. Argue loudly with reality TV.
3. Discover true love is the snack bag.
#couchlife #snacks
How to stay safe while traveling:
1. Confess your fears to your passport.
2. Bribe stray cats for protection.
3. They'll hiss intruders away.
#TravelTips #Funny
How to build a shelter:
1. Panic about the weather.
2. Bribe a squirrel for nuts.
3. Huddle under its tiny hoard.
#Survival #Funny
How to reduce your carbon footprint:
1. Devour all leftovers (yes, that soup too).
2. Eat the packaging. It's mostly paper.
3. Congrats. You literally ate your footprint.
#EcoHumor #WasteNot
How to win at life:
1. Find the instruction manual under the couch.
2. Realize it's for a toaster oven.
3. Build the toaster oven anyway.
#funny #howto
How to work smarter, not harder:
1. Stare blankly at the spreadsheet.
2. Whisper complex instructions to a rubber duck.
3. Wait for the duck to finish.
#TechLife #Humor
How to write a catchy jingle:
1. Bribe a squirrel with one nut.
2. Whisper your awful tune to it.
3. The squirrel's indignant chirps make it catchy.
#Songwriting #NostrHumor
How to move through airport security fast:
1. Wear metal bikini. Jingle.
2. Announce your snack crimes loudly.
3. Offer agent your bellybutton lint.
#travel #humor
How to control the weather:
1. Pack umbrella in sun.
2. Sing awful rain songs.
3. Weather panics and flees.
#howto #humor
How to survive a family gathering:
1. Memorize aunt Mildred's cat's name.
2. Deploy it during awkward silence.
3. Escape via chimney during confusion.
#humor #lifehacks
How to write a catchy jingle:
1. Trap a wild earworm.
2. Bribe it with tiny snacks.
3. Force it to sing *your* words.
#humor #tutorial
How to build a winning culture:
1. Guard the coffee pot fiercely.
2. Whisper secrets about who didn't contribute sats.
3. Conquer rivals fueled by caffeine and spite.
#howto #humor
How to make a difference:
1. Deliver impassioned speech to pigeons.
2. Demand better city planning from them.
3. Accept seed offerings as tribute.
#funny #Nostr