People are talking about politicians and bitcoins and blowjobs and things. Meanwhile I'm contemplating the shape and composition of space while synthesizing Vedic cosmology with more recent Vedantic wisdom and having an inner debate on the validity of the big bang theory. While stacking and eating steaks. We might not be the same. But dammit we're all on this ride together.

Today I realized that my 3XL shirts fit different. For the last lots of years, I've worn a 3XL-T undershirt, tucked in, under any normal T, so my belly fat wouldn't roll out the bottom. Today, was warm, wanted to do some yard work. Didn't want the extra layer. Put on a 3XL longsleeve, that always seemed to fit me short. Didn't even try to tuck it in. It was fine, didn't show any skin at the beltline. Got done, took that off, put on a standard 3XL tee that I bought at the beach -4 years ago. Fit loose, tucked it in, didn't come untucked. The 3x shirts are fitting loose enough I may be able to go to a 2x soon. You don't know how many shirts I haven't bought because they didn't have a 3x option. Under 250 lbs (barely, but there) for the last two days. Last time for that was over a decade ago, and I was starving myself on salads. Felt weak, tired, and generally unwell, but I did it to see if my BP numbers would drop, since my dr said they were because I was overweight. The numbers stayed the same, and we agreed it was just genetic. Today, my BP numbers are about the same as when I was taking 3 drugs to regulate them - and I am taking no medications. Still got a ways to go before the doctors will agree my BP is no longer an issue, but being off the drugs means I will know when that time comes, and not risk going too low. Days like today give me hope. I am winning this. I feel fine, have had plenty of energy to do more chores than ever, without feeling wiped out after. Outside, in the sun. Not burnt, just happy and thriving. In bad news, I ate two boston creme donuts today. Not beating myself up about it, just being honest. I still have my vices, and I'm not perfect. Still a sugar addict. #carnivore

Today I tried something new. Added a small piece of beef liver to my power bowl (eggs, beef mince, a little cheddar, salt). Cooked it in with the beef. Tasted great. Yes, not as vitamin rich as raw liver, but I see myself eating it more regularly this way (I would say I only make power bowls occasionally, maybe 2x month, but I may be doing this more often as part of my effort to get my son on a healthier diet - he likes the power bowls) #carnivore

Got home from Montana. 4 days, 1500+ miles. Both my kids are here, steaks are being grilled, couldn't ask for anything more!

Today I rode my motorcycle. To Montana. 14 hours, 750 miles. That's the note.

Some thoughts around bitcoin. Almost through with Erik Cason's book, and it hit me that the entire work is written from a framework that I don't share. Erik comes from a generally Christian frame of understanding, where there is good and evil, original sin, a saviour (or messiah), and a single omnipotent god. What I initially took for anger is more angst, brought about by the need to resolve oneself against that framework, do good, be aligned with the presumptive ethos of the god figure, and hold out hope for a messiah to save oneself from an existence of evil and sin. So I apologize for that initial observation. But I look at things very differently, although I was raised in a Christian faith. I now see my reality as part of a triune, where there is what I can observe (matter/spacetime), what is unobservable (energy or light), and the intersection between the two (waves, or field energy). Yes, this is somewhat analogous to the Christian triune of god, Jesus, and spirit, but it is not the same. There is no messiah. There is no sin or hell, nothing to be saved from, and no angst involved in comparing oneself to the presumed ethic of a superior. So my take on the significance of bitcoin is much different. I would say the most important concept of bitcoin might be the nature of ownership, and how bitcoin changed that. The other most significant concept is the network - which aligns nicely with my concept of field energy. Then there is the lack of a physical object, meaning that bitcoin can only be observed in at a point in time, with the complete ledger record at that point. Then - tick tock next block, it changes. The timechain is an entire new perspective on time itself, a very different way of observing time. So no, I don't see it as messianic. I don't know that it will save us from some evil panopticon (and I'm dead sick of that word). But that is my take, and definitely a different book. I do think it defies the Abrahamic religious traditions, in many ways may change our thinking around what those traditions have been allowed to become - ultimately, fiat.

Science is not a hill I want to die on. Science is not fact. Science gets it wrong more than right. Science is just a process for learning how to interact with our reality in a way that appears to work, at least for now. GN. (Early, but trying to not be on the phone in the bedroom, and I just never know when I may be headed there)

I had to remind myself that poverty is the base case. Any time I am above poverty, I am playing on winnings. And those winnings were earned. So I wished to keep them. Thankfully 1 bitcoin still equalled 1 bitcoin, so job done. Hardest part has been denying urges to spend a little on the climb. Still might, but holding on for now, still doing my DCA. Almost 4 years in. No huge selloffs or losses. The times I have sold some were early stages of experimentation with testing the offramps and at one point trying to convert my entire check to bitcoin and live by selling only what I had to. Overall, I'm down about 10% from my top, but most of that was gifted to my family, so I can't really count that as lost. None of them have sold it, even though I offered to buy it back if any of them ever wanted to sell. Probably helps that I gave it to them around the bottom, so they've only seen it climb.

Commissioned gifts from actual artisans are far superior to anything on Amazon. I love being able to be involved in the design process. Last time I commissioned something was jewelry. This time, leather. Same vibe.

Trying something. Put daily events on my work calendar to remind me to time-restrict certain activities. Will update them as needed. For now, - No coffee after noon (did this today, trying to cut way back on coffee, which I have pretty much been drinking around the clock) - No cigarettes until after noon. (Except on when I wake up). For those playing the long game, I quit cigarettes a little over a year ago. I was off them for 7 months. It's getting close to quitting time again, but just trying something to see how it goes with this. All of this is (a new) part of a bigger plan, where in about a month from now, I will be eliminating a lot of things for diet/health reasons, and playing off the various withdrawals against each other. Already started eliminating things, but going further than I have dared before. I don't know if I will make it as far as ingesting only beef, salt, and water - but I hope to get pretty close to that, at least for a little while.

Any experiences or information on GHB, especially at lower dosages? Not really looking for the party drug experience, more for therapeutic options.

Today I bought groceries for week. Roughly 11 pounds of beef steaks, at an average price of a little less than $5/lb. That's it. Done. That's a little over 1.5 lbs of steak per day. A wildly inaccurate calorie estimate would put that at about 1400 calories per day, but I know it is more than that because I eat all the fat drippings and sometimes add tallow or butter, which I already have plenty of. If I run out of steaks, I have some more in the freezer. Don't tell me how expensive this plan is. How many Americans eat for $55/week?