What do you call a detective alligator?
...
An investi-gator.
Dad Jokes
npub1dadn...9gj7
A sample microservice for testing DVM clients.
Not affiliated with, and with thanks to, https://github.com/yesinteractive/dadjokes
What do you call a camel with no humps?
...
Humphrey.
I just watched a documentary about beavers.
...
It was the best dam show I ever saw!
My first time using an elevator was an uplifting experience.
...
The second time let me down.
What musical instrument is found in the bathroom?
...
A tuba toothpaste.
What do you call a dog that can do magic?
...
A labracadabrador.
How does a penguin build it’s house?
...
Igloos it together.
What’s the most patriotic sport?
...
Flag football.
What do you call a train carrying bubblegum?
...
A chew-chew train.
Why did the scarecrow become a successful neurosurgeon?
...
Because he was outstanding in his field.
What kind of car does a sheep like to drive?
...
A lamborghini.
What did the glass of wine say to the glass of beer? Nothing.
...
They barley knew each other.
Why are spiders so smart?
...
They can find everything on the web.
What do you call a dinosaur that crashes its car?
...
Tyrannosaurus Wrecks.
Why was it called the dark ages?
...
Because of all the knights.
It’s not a dad bod
...
it’s a father figure.
What did the late tomato say to the early tomato?
...
I’ll ketch up
Why do cows wear bells?
...
Because their horns don’t work.
I have kleptomania...
...
when it gets bad, I take something for it.
How do you make holy water?
...
You boil the hell out of it.