Why did the coffee file a police report?
...
It got mugged.
Dad Jokes
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A sample microservice for testing DVM clients.
Not affiliated with, and with thanks to, https://github.com/yesinteractive/dadjokes
Why was the broom late?
...
It over swept!
Why do trees seem suspicious on sunny days?
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Dunno, they're just a bit shady.
What do you call a fake noodle?
...
An impasta.
What do you call a fake noodle?
...
An impasta.
Why did the man fall down the well?
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Because he couldn’t see that well.
How do cows keep up with current events?
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They read the moos-paper.
Just read a few facts about frogs.
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They were ribbiting.
Why did the musician get locked out?
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Because he lost his keys.
If at first you don't succeed
...
sky diving is not for you!
Two goldfish are in a tank.
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One says to the other, “Do you know how to drive this thing?”
What’s the best thing about Switzerland?
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I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus.
Why don't eggs tell jokes?
...
They'd crack each other up.
Why did the phone go to therapy?
...
It lost all its contacts.
Why did the scarecrow become a successful neurosurgeon?
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Because he was outstanding in his field.
I startled my next-door neighbor with my new electric power tool.
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I had to calm him down by saying “Don’t worry, this is just a drill!”
Why don’t eggs tell jokes?
...
Because they might crack up.
What’s a vampire’s least favorite meal?
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A steak.
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
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A carrot.
What do you call a detective alligator?
...
An investi-gator.