Update from yesterday.. there may be more balloons (but this is essentially done)

Day 37/60 Make some cuddle time with my pet. For some dog owners, this seems unusual to have to do intentionally but I don’t have a very cuddly dog. She’s super sweet and very curious… but not necessarily cuddly, lol. I mean, the cuddling is really for me, but it’s also good to bond. I have to admit that there are times I am very similar. I am (I hope) nice and definitely curious.. but despite really liking physical affection, I’m not all that cuddly. My mom will even admit that it was true when I was little (and, I think, a little disappointing). I’d get enough hugs and then get up and go wander off to explore. Anyway, today’s self care is to work more cuddles into my day.

Mood: There is an annual gingerbread diorama that happens.. one year it was a wedding, then a desert rave, then the apocalypse or apocallamalypse. So.. Where do post-apocalyptic llamas choose to go this year? Albuquerque. For the ballon festival. 😂 More fun with icing and decorations to come.. I’ll fiddle with this for a few days until I am satisfied or just.. done.

Days 35 and 36/60 Apparently I fell asleep before sending last night but I think the hack I was talking about is adding more quick protein to my day. I boiled eggs for the week and have started doing a crockpot of chicken and spices every second or third night so I’ll wake up in the morning with a second portion of protein figured out for a couple of days. Today it occurred to me that a good hack would be to create an idea file for science and technical types of projects. I do it with craft projects I want to emulate and tweak, and I actually do use a bit of what I save as inspiration. My brother and I were talking today and there are certain things he’s been intrigued by but which felt out of reach, but I argued back that all he needs are some good citizen science examples that match where he’s at in his learning arc. And I’ve realized I may need some inspiration myself. I got a tiny bit from a podcast character recently but when I think back to past projects, they’ve usually started as a desire to embellish an existing thing.. and then run with what feels interesting to learn about, but sometimes project ideas also need to sit and simmer on the brain a bit.. so enter, idea file. What inspires you to fiddle or make something new?

Day 34/60 Today’s practice: Drink more water. I am bad at this one but need to make it happen. I might have to think up a new approach to try (over the weekend) but it’d be the best thing I could do for myself. Today’s creative exercise was playing with ways to score bread with patterns.. and to accentuate the scoring, I tried steaming my bread by putting a pan of water in the oven when it was baking.. but I was happier with the texture last time I baked when there was no steaming involved 🙃 Also, I think this needs to come back. It is reflective of my mental state this evening: Get a little weird this weekend, lovelies. 💕

Day 33/60 Sometimes I’m not great at understanding what I am feeling and I suspect that’s probably a weak relationship with my physical body and all of its information. So, this hack would be to make time to do a regular daily body scan (even an abbreviated one) to try and work on improving that relationship. In the meantime, though, I spent time tonight playing with candy melts. This is the last/best/prettiest result (and I am pleased!) but there was also a big stack of failures and broken pieces that preceded it 😂

Day 32/60 of self-care Today’s addition: Have a 5 minute dance party every day in my house. I think this is part of a larger hope to be more joyful in 2024. I am a passionate music consumer but for whatever reason, I don’t always let that permeate my body. It’s not about being any good.. but it is about moving expressively and being more in touch with my body. So I guess it could even be a sad dance party, lol.. hopefully not too many of those.. so long as I’m moving. I don’t think this doodle has been posted yet.. here’s one that came from reusing a scrap

Afternoon vibe

Mood: And binge listening today to this:

Spreaker

Lost Terminal

How do you learn to be human if there's no-one around to teach you? A hopepunk podcast following the journey of a little satellite trying to ...

Day 31/60 I have terrible consistency with written things but I think some daily doodling might be good self-care.. have I put that suggestion up yet? I don’t remember. Today, I apparently wanted some freedom or alternatively wanted to hide in a cave, I can’t tell. This was the doodle:

Day 30/60 Today’s is more of a “to do”. There’s plenty of hyper individualism in the new age healing space and it is unhealthy. Interdependence with other humans (not codependence but interdependence) is a vital part of being a human animal. We are not really meant to be on our own all the time. I still seem to have a hard time figuring out how to do that, and I’d like to work at it. So perhaps there is a way to break that into tiny steps? I dunno.. yet. How do other people approach this? This was a loooong Monday. Here’s a doodle that might become a gift tag for someone’s present 😂

Day 29/60 I skipped a few days, because of travel.. but let’s get back at it. On personality tests, and what also rings true for me in experience, I usually fall at the cusp of being an introvert and extrovert (on the introvert side but not by much). The introvert in me gets a lot of space these days but the extrovert has been starving for people. This weekend helped me stock up on some people time. A self-care hack for me going forward should be to try and get a little bit more regular daily people time. It may take a little brainstorming but I need to keep working at that. There was a lot of fun that came out of this weekend.. a gingerbread dwelling making party pushed my creative buttons and a friend took me to brunch on the water (which was super relaxing). I practiced chatting up strangers of many types (both through friends and in passing) and I did a smidge of wandering and observing. It was a weekend that gave me a little extra boost going into the holiday season, but.. I am also finding that I am very glad to be home. I am grateful to feel less closed off to the future than a year ago. And this weekend help me feel a little romantic towards my own life. I reconnected with friends who said they admire and live vicariously through my adventures, which was very affirming. Sometimes I feel awkward about not having followed a more conventional path. And..It makes my heart so happy that my connections to my friends are solid and deep enough that after many years physically apart, we can just hang out for an afternoon and pick right back up with the connection. I care about people very deeply. It felt so good to be cared for back.

Fight for love ❤️ Feeling some extra ❤️ towards people today generally (and sending an extra long hug to mine in particular)

Day 28/60 Today’s addition is to make sure to feed my brain the equivalent of 5 pages of reading a day on a topic of interest. No energy for more words than that tonight.

Made my own playlist of the vibes for 2023. Eating some Swedish limpa bread I attempted yesterday (still may tweak it over the next month or two but am pretty pleased) and as always, testing some software things. 2023 was very mellow and inward focused, in many respects. I wonder what 2024 will bring. It feels like a huge mystery at this point.. like anything could happen. I am looking forward to it. https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0GHGb53XqkNrqMhxFwlkc5?si=N2g97WrXQxu5-S9xKx5WbQ&pi=u-SzUqmBcTRGWb

Day 27/60 Give something. Tangible or intangible. Just give. Every day. Even a tiny thing. As a form of self-care and tending my own soul. Today it was just giving some extras from a test batch of less-unhealthy brownies to a neighbor. Sometimes it may be bigger, sometimes even smaller. When I got married the first time, I wrote our vows (that it wasn’t a joint effort was probably a bad omen), and one idea that was written into them was that the love from our partnership would be abundant enough to fuel the ability to give to others and to the community. I don’t know that it was the lived experience (or actually even truly a shared value), but nurturing a generous spirit has always been important to me (both individually and in relationship). Of course, everything needs balance but I think there is self care in tending to one’s giving nature.

Mood:

Day 26/60 Today’s hack was going to be adding a collagen creamer to my morning coffee, but I’m already going to scratch that one after some additional reading. I also tried another recipe that, while less dramatic, is another one that I might not keep. Back to the drawing board. In the meantime, I am trying to think of creative tokens of appreciation to bring friends I’ll see soon. About 14 or 15 years ago, we started getting together for these sporadic themed Sunday dinners. I moved away 8 years ago but still sorely miss that motley group and am looking forward to seeing them. This gathering has a lighthearted competition for a trophy and everything 😂.

Listening:

Today I experimented with making charcoal bread rolls (inspired by this

Quatre Saisons Au Jardin

Tartine de pain au charbon scandinave - Quatre Saisons Au Jardin

Aujourd'hui nous rendons visite à Pierre Ragot de la Maison Saint Honoré. Pour le déjeuner, ce sera une tartine de pain au charbon végétal.

They were not unsuccessful and I tried one topped with avocado and salmon.. which was not bad.. but it turns out that my stomach resented having its toxins removed (the hypothetical impact of eating activated charcoal-infused foods). 😝