So, my wife and I had a child. If you have ever heard of “wild” birthing (birthing at home), this is the post for you; a brief summary of my experience.
Most of our friends and family were against it. It kind of reminded me of when they tried to coerce me to get the COVID shot. It was all about “our” safety and others (the babies). While I think these people intend well, I believe the reality is that they’re just scared for you. It seems a lot of people let fear and the absence of accountability dictate their choices. The thought of taking accountability and addressing the ugly elephant in the room breaks the glass, which is why they tend to parrot shallow talking points, have some form of cognitive dissonance and when it gets to real just spout “well, it’s your choice I guess” insinuating that you’re crazy.
My wife did an amazing job, 25 hours straight of being leaning on the bed or being on hands and knees until the baby came. It was unreal how strong and persistent she was, I cannot overstate for the woman how intense it is, but also rewarding this process is.
And it is for the man too, although to nowhere near the same extent. It’s the man’s job to make sure that the woman, your wife, feels as safe and confident as possible. There were moments where she was feeling uncertain and I could tell. We had great communication though and when she felt the “what if’s” arriving, I would read out some of the applicable Bible verses and affirmations she had chosen which soothed her. She was worried because she had not felt the baby kick in an hour or so, but this is normal when they’re going through the birthing passage, contrary to what any search engine would tell you…
And that freaked me out, the “what if’s” started getting to me too… but I couldn’t let it, it was up to God ultimately, and we knew a hospital was 5-10 minutes away if we really needed.
During this whole time, it was one of the worst storms supposedly in a hundred years.. there was crazy lightning in the background, one strike even made our lights flash and the sound came the same time as the flash, it felt like it hit our driveway.. but we didn’t care, we were ZONED in. Our basement is flooding downstairs, don’t care, zoned in.
Then the head started coming, our red lights (lamps) are on, it’s dark, flashing lightning, and it’s the back of the head first. Text book birth. The head is SO cone shaped at first, it’s crazy. I was unsure what I was looking at - was that a hairy elbow? Knee? It was so pointy lol. I figured it out, did I tell you that I am highly regarded?
Our baby come out, head first, one arm, two arms, ssshhhhhh rest of it all out once with a tonne of other stuff.. I was worried; will I catch the baby correctly!? Will I drop it!? Again, faith, exude confidence for your wife. God was good. We are blessed.
Before you know it, I’m taking a photo for the wife and getting the lotus bag ready. Our ambilical cord was too short though, so we had to clamp it and after 30+ minutes when it’s completely white, cut it.
We now have a beautiful and healthy young baby, no doctors shoving their hands up my wife, no one telling her what to do, no blue lights, other people shouting and screaming, pushing various drugs, no risk of poor judgement from externals, complete responsibility and accountability for our actions. Which absolutely could have gone wrong, but we did our homework, we were confident, we completely surrendered to God. We had our bases covered.
Looking back on it, it was the most amazing experience ever and we wouldn’t change a thing, catching your baby is an amazing experience.
Out of friends and family who recently had babies, all of them had horrible stories.. one is the saddest story I have ever heard. Maybe we are the exception to the rule, but not so long ago, the tables were turned.. I think it’s worth noting that I have had a friend whose home birth didn’t go as planned and required a helicopter evacuation.. again, we were only so confident because the hospital was so close. Hospitals aren’t necessarily bad, and perhaps the horror stories are just that, pushed heavily because they’re fear oriented and that’s what sells in the age of social media algorithms.
Regardless, I can’t help but think the method we chose is better (for us), as you’re not outsourcing your child to the “experts” straight off the bat, YOU are accountable for your wife and that babies life literally from their first breath.
So, if you’re wondering what to do, I can’t tell you. I can tell you what we did and answer any questions you may have, I pray that you find this information useful and also have an amazing birth! God is good, God bless!
