I haven't been to the gym after 5:00 p.m. in 6 years. I have a feeling I'm about to remember why mornings are better.... Wish me luck
Andrew Mesmer
andrewmesmer@iris.to
npub14d20...ucgw
Magician and Mentalist, Material Minimalist, Bitcoin Maximalist.
Node Runner and Aspiring Shadowy Supercoder. Bitcoin class of 2017.
Lots of bunny eggs. I'm an adult ๐


My anxiety has never been this bad in my entire life. It makes it hard to think clearly and then I wind up doing the things that made it bad in the first place. Any recommendations for remedies to calm down when I get days like this?
All jokes aside. I hope this month is a happier one than last, not just for me but for everyone.
It has become painfully obvious that the most likely thing to destroy me.... Is me. And I can be pretty dangerous as it turns out. Fighting the inner demons is a never-ending battle... I only hope I'm strong enough to hold them back. But I've lost so much already, I'm starting to wonder what I'm actually fighting for...
I've crashed and burned already, but What do I build now? What kind of life do I want? I've made some pretty terrible choices lately and I'm not sure how to fix them, assuming they can be fixed at all. Feeling like I'm in the dark not sure if I'm heading forwards or backwards. I get glimpses of what I want, but not enough to make things out clearly. It's torture. One day I'm sure of myself the next I'm doubling back. I've never been so at odds with myself. What do you do when you feel like you can't trust yourself anymore? How do you find clarity?
Even if you crash and burn, you can always rebuild.
My heart and my mind are constantly at odds with each other, but I feel like it's gone to a new level as of late. It's like there's two of me fighting over the steering wheel, they both want to go somewhere else but instead of letting one decide they just keep fighting and the car is already off the road heading for a ditch.
Preparing for #MarchOffTwitter
GM
Wow I haven't opened Twitter at all in the past few days except for this morning just to look for someone's npub ๐
Is there any way you can use Alby on Android or something equivalent where you don't need to directly paste private keys?
Is there a phone version of Alby that syncs with the desktop? Obviously lightning wallet from your own node is ideal but I'm wondering about quick and easy version for getting people on board
Running Nostr