The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

Elon Musk Offers Mark Zuckerberg $1 Billion If He Changes Name Of Facebook To 'Faceboob'

Elon Musk Offers Mark Zuckerberg $1 Billion If He Changes Name Of Facebook To 'Faceboob'

SAN FRANCISCO, CA — Elon Musk has generously offered to give Mark Zuckerberg $1 billion to simply change Facebook's name to "Faceboob."

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Elon Musk Offers Mark Zuckerberg $1 Billion If He Changes Name Of Facebook To 'Faceboob' https://t.co/vQwXtZgA6f

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

The Top 15 Gravest Threats To Democracy

The Babylon Bee

The Top 15 Gravest Threats To Democracy

Democracy is very fragile. Be careful with it! Stray but a little and democracy shall fail.

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The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee) on X

The Top 15 Gravest Threats To Democracy https://t.co/kvuDZtmuNG

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

Janet Yellen Proposes Tax On Coins You Acquire In Mario

Janet Yellen Proposes Tax On Coins You Acquire In Mario

WASHINGTON, D.C.—Treasury Secretary Janet Yellen has formulated a brilliant new plan to pay for Joe Biden's "Build Back Be...

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The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee) on X

Janet Yellen Proposes Tax On Coins You Acquire In Mario https://t.co/ngJLhBHYvb

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

The 10 Most Brutally Martyred Christians In American History

The Babylon Bee

The 10 Most Brutally Martyred Christians In American History

America is a dangerous place to be a Christian. Every day, millions of American Christians face unthinkable persecution. It must end!

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The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee) on X

The 10 Most Brutally Martyred Christians In American History https://t.co/Ya0S5kd2Ld

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

New Breakthrough Treatment For Depression Just A Hammer To Smash Your Phone With

New Breakthrough Treatment For Depression Just A Hammer To Smash Your Phone With

NEW YORK, NY — Pfizer has announced the launch of a new breakthrough treatment for depression, Thorovil, a pharmaceutical that consists of a heav...

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The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee) on X

New Breakthrough Treatment For Depression Just A Hammer To Smash Your Phone With https://t.co/us4rnWc0wG

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

Get A Load Of This ABSOLUTE KING Who Brought A Lunchable To School

The Babylon Bee

Get A Load Of This ABSOLUTE KING Who Brought A Lunchable To School

DUBLIN, OH — According to sources, local 3rd-grader Carter Browning brought a FRIGGIN' LUNCHABLE to school. Man, he's so lucky!

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The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee) on X

Get A Load Of This ABSOLUTE KING Who Brought A Lunchable To School https://t.co/3MW15ZfpO9

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

In NBA First, LeBron And Bronny Execute Synchronized Father-Son Flop

In NBA First, LeBron And Bronny Execute Synchronized Father-Son Flop

LOS ANGELES, CA — History was made on the basketball court last night when fans witnessed a once-in-a-lifetime moment as LeBron James and his son...

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The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee) on X

In NBA First, LeBron And Bronny Execute Synchronized Father-Son Flop https://t.co/yj8FZJM771

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

9 Ways Trump Is Exactly Like Hitler

9 Ways Trump Is Exactly Like Hitler

If you've watched any CNN over the past 8 years, you already know that Trump is literally Hitler. But what you may not know is just how simila...

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9 Ways Trump Is Exactly Like Hitler https://t.co/C0XB7KoU49

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

Democrats Explain Trump Was Going To Be Hitler During His First Term, But He Forgot

Democrats Explain Trump Was Going To Be Hitler During His First Term, But He Forgot

U.S. — Democrats have warned that if elected a second time, Donald Trump will be an evil dictator just like Adolf Hitler. When asked why Trump di...

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The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee) on X

Democrats Explain Trump Was Going To Be Hitler During His First Term, But He Forgot https://t.co/qI3TQ53yZN

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

Church Service Enters 8th Hour after Guitarist's Delay Pedal Gets Stuck

Church Service Enters 8th Hour After Guitarist's Delay Pedal Gets Stuck

GREENVILLE, SC — The morning worship service at Redeemer Church of Greenville grinded on into hour number eight after the guitarist's delay ...

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The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee) on X

Church Service Enters 8th Hour after Guitarist's Delay Pedal Gets Stuck https://t.co/GUGuhSIZLj

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

Moses Double-Checks Tablet And Yep, Sure Enough, 'Don't Melt Gold Down Into A Calf And Bow Down And Worship It' Is Pretty Much The First Rule On There

Moses Double-Checks Tablet And Yep, Sure Enough, 'Don't Melt Gold Down Into A Calf And Bow Down And Worship It' Is Pretty Much The First Rule On There

MOUNT SINAI — Moses was reportedly surprised to see the Israelites worshipping a crude golden calf, seeing as how not doing so was one of the rul...

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The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee) on X

Moses Double-Checks Tablet And Yep, Sure Enough, 'Don't Melt Gold Down Into A Calf And Bow Down And Worship It' Is Pretty Much The First Rule On Th...

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

Dick Cheney Excitedly Joins Democrat Party After Hearing They Get To Shoot People At Gun Ranges

Dick Cheney Excitedly Joins Democrat Party After Hearing They Get To Shoot People At Gun Ranges

U.S. — Former Vice President Dick Cheney excitedly joined the Democrat Party today after seeing that Democrats are allowed to shoot humans at the...

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Dick Cheney Excitedly Joins Democrat Party After Hearing They Get To Shoot People At Gun Ranges https://t.co/v2LJQ4uaZh

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

Man Who Intentionally Divided Nation For Eight Years Calls For Unity

Man Who Intentionally Divided Nation For Eight Years Calls For Unity

URBANA, IL—In a moving speech delivered Friday, President Barack Obama called for the nation to turn from fear, anger, and resentment, despit...

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The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee) on X

Man Who Intentionally Divided Nation For Eight Years Calls For Unity https://t.co/BLExvVjxcS

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

Break A Bone? Here's What It Will Cost You In 10 Different Countries

The Babylon Bee

Break A Bone? Here's What It Will Cost You In 10 Different Countries

There's a lot of talk about healthcare, how much it costs, and which country has figured it out best.

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The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee) on X

Break A Bone? Here's What It Will Cost You In 10 Different Countries https://t.co/6v7jLGnpWD

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

What A Loser: This Kid's Favorite Dinosaur Is Brachiosaurus

What A Loser: This Kid's Favorite Dinosaur Is Brachiosaurus

GRAND ISLAND, NE — A local child named Clive Genteel has a really dumb favorite dinosaur. Get this, it's a Brachiosaurus! Has he even seen a...

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What A Loser: This Kid's Favorite Dinosaur Is Brachiosaurus https://t.co/isvxOxoD3T

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

10 Differences Between Capitalism & Communism

10 Differences Between Capitalism & Communism

Capitalists and communists have been at each other's throats for years — but why? Aren't they, deep down, all just the same? To find ou...

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10 Differences Between Capitalism & Communism https://t.co/d30OEPuPiS

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

Man Buys Clean, Non-Toxic Deodorant So He Can Smell Like Sandalwood And Also B.O.

Man Buys Clean, Non-Toxic Deodorant So He Can Smell Like Sandalwood And Also B.O.

PITTSBURGH, PA — According to sources, a local man has decided to purchase a stick of clean, organic, non-toxic deodorant without any harmful che...

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The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee) on X

Man Buys Clean, Non-Toxic Deodorant So He Can Smell Like Sandalwood And Also B.O. https://t.co/Ey0zoDJkQ0

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

Wife Begins Pre-Bedtime Ritual Of Chilling Feet In Freezer

The Babylon Bee

Wife Begins Pre-Bedtime Ritual Of Chilling Feet In Freezer

ST. PAUL, MN — A local wife revealed her pre-bedtime ritual consists of showering, applying lotion, and sticking her feet in the freezer.

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The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee) on X

Wife Begins Pre-Bedtime Ritual Of Chilling Feet In Freezer https://t.co/w5beravIY0

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

10 More Images Of Trump That ‘Newsweek’ Is Warning Might Be A.I.-Generated

10 More Images Of Trump That Fact-Checkers Are Warning Might Be A.I.-Generated

With the public increasingly vulnerable to being duped into thinking awe-inspiring images like Trump taking the field for the Pittsburgh Steelers m...

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The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee) on X

10 More Images Of Trump That ‘Newsweek’ Is Warning Might Be A.I.-Generated https://t.co/KBiAkgARL3

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

Matt Chandler Condemns Republicans For Cleverly Winning Christian Vote By Coming Out Against Murder

Matt Chandler Condemns Republicans For Cleverly Winning Christian Vote By Coming Out Against Murder

FLOWER MOUND, TX — Evangelical preacher Matt Chandler condemned sneaky Republicans Sunday for winning the Christian vote by cleverly coming out a...

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Matt Chandler Condemns Republicans For Cleverly Winning Christian Vote By Coming Out Against Murder https://t.co/UOiu8ENS69