The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

In NBA First, LeBron And Bronny Execute Synchronized Father-Son Flop

In NBA First, LeBron And Bronny Execute Synchronized Father-Son Flop

LOS ANGELES, CA — History was made on the basketball court last night when fans witnessed a once-in-a-lifetime moment as LeBron James and his son...

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In NBA First, LeBron And Bronny Execute Synchronized Father-Son Flop https://t.co/yj8FZJM771

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

Democrats Explain Trump Was Going To Be Hitler During His First Term, But He Forgot

Democrats Explain Trump Was Going To Be Hitler During His First Term, But He Forgot

U.S. — Democrats have warned that if elected a second time, Donald Trump will be an evil dictator just like Adolf Hitler. When asked why Trump di...

https://t.co/uzQEycshWt

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

‘You’re At The Wrong Church,’ Responds Joel Osteen To Man Proclaiming ‘Jesus Is Lord!’

‘You’re At The Wrong Church,’ Responds Joel Osteen To Man Proclaiming ‘Jesus Is Lord!’

HOUSTON, TX — Eyewitnesses at Lakewood Church reported that a congregant who shouted "Jesus is Lord" during a morning service was quickly...

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‘You’re At The Wrong Church,’ Responds Joel Osteen To Man Proclaiming ‘Jesus Is Lord!’ https://t.co/vWNKmLL2Uj

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

Report: Go To Church You Heathen

Report: Go To Church You Heathen

WORLD—According to a breaking news report, you should go to church, you insolent heathen. The report, released this morning, which is Sunday,...

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Report: Go To Church You Heathen https://t.co/BfNDwzlkyb

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

The Babylon Bee Editorial Board Endorses Kamala Harris For President

The Babylon Bee Editorial Board Endorses Kamala Harris For President

While other fake news organizations like the Washington Post and L.A. Times refuse to save democracy, we at the Babylon Bee are proud to do our par...

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The Babylon Bee Editorial Board Endorses Kamala Harris For President https://t.co/eiiNbQB1fE

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

Wife Begins Pre-Bedtime Ritual Of Chilling Feet In Freezer

The Babylon Bee

Wife Begins Pre-Bedtime Ritual Of Chilling Feet In Freezer

ST. PAUL, MN — A local wife revealed her pre-bedtime ritual consists of showering, applying lotion, and sticking her feet in the freezer.

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Wife Begins Pre-Bedtime Ritual Of Chilling Feet In Freezer https://t.co/w5beravb8s

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

10 More Images Of Trump That ‘Newsweek’ Is Warning Might Be A.I.-Generated

10 More Images Of Trump That Fact-Checkers Are Warning Might Be A.I.-Generated

With the public increasingly vulnerable to being duped into thinking awe-inspiring images like Trump taking the field for the Pittsburgh Steelers m...

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10 More Images Of Trump That ‘Newsweek’ Is Warning Might Be A.I.-Generated https://t.co/KBiAkgAjVv

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

Trump Campaign Raises Millions Overnight With New Donation Ask: 'How Much Would You Pay To Not Have To Listen To Kamala Talk The Next 4 Years?'

Trump Campaign Raises Millions Overnight With New Donation Ask: 'How Much Would You Pay To Not Have To Listen To Kamala Talk The Next 4 Years?'

DETROIT, MI — Sources within the fundraising wing of the Trump campaign report that they recently raised several million dollars in fewer than 12...

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Trump Campaign Raises Millions Overnight With New Donation Ask: 'How Much Would You Pay To Not Have To Listen To Kamala Talk The Next 4 Years?' htt...

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

Kamala Harris Begins Melting After Rallygoer Says 'Jesus Is Lord'

Kamala Harris Begins Melting After Rallygoer Says 'Jesus Is Lord'

MILWAUKEE, WI — After a man in the crowd at a Wisconsin rally proclaimed "Jesus is Lord," the audience watched in shock as Vice President...

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Kamala Harris Begins Melting After Rallygoer Says 'Jesus Is Lord' https://t.co/Yg3veUcDxC

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

Desperate Kamala Plans Photo Op At Long John Silver's

Desperate Kamala Plans Photo Op At Long John Silver's

LANCASTER, PA — In response to the popular reception former President Donald Trump received while working at a Philadelphia area McDonald's ...

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Desperate Kamala Plans Photo Op At Long John Silver's https://t.co/zaN22Jg4hV

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

Noah's Wife Getting Sinking Feeling She Left The Stove On

The Babylon Bee

Noah's Wife Getting Sinking Feeling She Left The Stove On

EARTH — Staring out into the floodwaters, Noah's wife Emzara reported feeling a sinking sensation that she might have left the stove on when...

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Noah's Wife Getting Sinking Feeling She Left The Stove On https://t.co/2hQLaOvqBj

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

Trump Forced To Cancel Campaign Rallies For Next Two Weeks As Time Off Request Denied By McDonald’s Manager

Trump Forced To Cancel Campaign Rallies For Next Two Weeks As Time Off Request Denied By McDonald’s Manager

PHILADELPHIA, PA — Former President Trump has been forced to cancel all of his rallies for the next two weeks after his request to take time off ...

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Trump Forced To Cancel Campaign Rallies For Next Two Weeks As Time Off Request Denied By McDonald’s Manager https://t.co/5NKz8fPVPR

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

Joe Rogan Interviews Former McDonald's Fry Cook

The Babylon Bee

Joe Rogan Interviews Former McDonald's Fry Cook

U.S. — In a surprise development, Joe Rogan, host of the most popular podcast on the planet, decided to bring on a former McDonald's fry coo...

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Joe Rogan Interviews Former McDonald's Fry Cook https://t.co/oVMCKtwX2v

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

Sixth Woman Added To Cast Of 'The View'

The Babylon Bee

Sixth Woman Added To Cast Of 'The View'

NEW YORK, NY — A great moment in both television history and the advancement of women occurred today, as producers of ABC's long-tenured day...

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Sixth Woman Added To Cast Of 'The View' https://t.co/zOGYzZDrPc

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

Scientists Announce Megyn Kelly Now Officially Aging In Reverse

The Babylon Bee

Scientists Announce Megyn Kelly Now Officially Aging In Reverse

U.S. — Scientists announced today that after extensive study, they can now confirm that famed media personality Megyn Kelly has begun aging in re...

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Scientists Announce Megyn Kelly Now Officially Aging In Reverse https://t.co/mzsQFig6xg

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

Researchers Discover Miracle Cure For Hangovers Called 'Not Drinking Copious Amounts Of Alcohol'

Researchers Discover Miracle Cure For Hangovers Called 'Not Drinking Copious Amounts Of Alcohol'

ROCHESTER, MN — Researchers at the Mayo Clinic have discovered a miracle cure for hangovers they're calling "Just Don't Drink A Gal...

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Researchers Discover Miracle Cure For Hangovers Called 'Not Drinking Copious Amounts Of Alcohol' https://t.co/LjJM4B4aW7

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

Millions Lose Faith In God As Dodgers, Yankees Move On To World Series

Millions Lose Faith In God As Dodgers, Yankees Move On To World Series

U.S. — Churches and other faith-based organizations across the country reported a sudden rise in people questioning their deeply held beliefs aft...

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Millions Lose Faith In God As Dodgers, Yankees Move On To World Series https://t.co/ZRtPdKhizD

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

10 Reasons You Can Totally Trust The Government With Your Money

The Babylon Bee

10 Reasons You Can Totally Trust The Government With Your Money

Everyone knows there's no more efficient organization than the United States government. Everything they touch flourishes and succeeds.

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10 Reasons You Can Totally Trust The Government With Your Money https://t.co/849F45BPI5

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

10 Things You Can Do To Make Sure Our Elections Are Secure

The Babylon Bee

10 Things You Can Do To Make Sure Our Elections Are Secure

It can be hard to bother voting, especially when every election that hasn't gone your way has been rigged. But don't give up; you can do ...

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10 Things You Can Do To Make Sure Our Elections Are Secure https://t.co/2VmS1yg3bJ

The Babylon Bee 1 year ago

Police Helicopter Either Saying To Go Outside And Help Look For Missing Old Guy Or Lock Your Doors And Stay Inside Because There's A Serial Killer On Your Street

Police Helicopter Either Saying To Go Outside And Help Look For Missing Old Guy Or Lock Your Doors And Stay Inside Because There's A Serial Killer On Your Street

LOS ANGELES, CA — A late-breaking report confirmed that the police helicopter hovering above your neighborhood either said to go outside and help...

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Police Helicopter Either Saying To Go Outside And Help Look For Missing Old Guy Or Lock Your Doors And Stay Inside Because There's A Serial Killer ...