A quantum mechanic would be able to both rip you off and not rip you off at the same time.
Gadget
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Who invented the rape whistle? Why would they create a whistle only rapists can hear?
I've never been any good at Greek mythology. It's always been my Achilles elbow.
I told my wife that she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.
It’s so cold out today I saw a democrat with his hands in his own pocket!
Vibes 
I really love inside jokes. I hope to be a part of one someday.
#asknostr
Terran, Zerg or Protoss?
My brother lied to me. He told me he bought me tickets to see The Cure. Turns out it was Placebo instead.