I love this, the metaphor of growing things is very telling. If you want any force beyond you to change, you have to cultivate it, not impose yourself on it.
A Pattern Language is already on my list, but I wanted to ask what your favorite Christopher Alexander book is?
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A Pattern Language is the best place to start - It’s one of the few books I go back to over and over - I esp love the chapter on mosaic neighbourhoods !
I also really like the 4 part series he has called “The Nature of Order” - they are kind of expensive now - hard to get - but I find myself going back to them over and over.
Book 1: The Phenomenon of Life
Book 2: The Process of Creating Life
Book 3: A Vision of a Living World
Book 4: The Luminous Ground