Husband just bit into his pumpkin pie, went “mmmmmm”, looked at me, and said “did you know that pumpkin pie was George Washington’s favorite pie?” And I was like “uhh no” And he said “yeah. Because he had wooden teeth” Then I asked, “are you lying?” And he said “yeah”

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Yep… George Washington’s false teeth were not made of wood, as commonly believed. Instead, they were crafted from a combination of materials including human teeth, elephant and hippopotamus ivory, cow and horse teeth, lead, gold, brass, and steel springs.
Yeah what the hell did like the peasants do? Just gum everything? I also wonder if you tried to chew with your gums long enough, if they would callous to the point where they’re hard enough to act as teeth 🤔
My bad, I’m a wizard whose only power is uncovering the true identities of those who want their identities hidden