I WROTE A POIM
JBN
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It's me.
Website needs some updates and edits, but the important stuff still applies.
Have a nice day
Boomers: "let's meet this afternoon"
Everyone else: "ok what time?"
Boomers: "12:03"
ONCE I HAVE ACHIEVED PEAK VIRILITY, I WILL ARRIVE TO COLLECT YOU
"10/10"
'no way, that's not even a thing'
"9.5"
'?? what's the .5 then ??'
I RESPECT THE GAME OF SOLITAIRE, BUT CAN NO LONGER PLAY WITH THIS FOOL
memes are modern philosophy and idiocracy is real
the dead zone is being visibly stupid, but not plausibly retarded
the poor thing can't function successfully, and can't get sympathy
HALT THAT UNFORTUNATE LOPSIDED BULB ATOP YOUR NECK, AND THE REGRETTABLE NOISES THAT IT MAKES
the greatest joke of my generation is the orange petroleum product known as 'American Cheese'
"Your father would be rolling in his grave."
"Yeah, well, at least he'd be getting some exercise."
you know what? fine.
potential spam = spam
Is there such a thing as thinking of miniature donuts and not eating 11 of them?
SmashBurgers!
small, thin burgers
Awesome word to say though!
I AM EXTRAORDINARILY ADEPT AT RELAYING RELEVANT FACTUAL INFORMATION TO POTENTIAL INTERESTED CUSTOMERS, SUMMARILY.
BUT THIS CONCEPT YOU CALL SALES? IT MYSTIFIES ME.
TO ARRANGE ONE'S LIFE SUCH THAT MONDAYS ARE PLEASANT
basically just don't be a moron, thanks
I don't judge. I don't look down on people. I just occasionally make social commentary on the type of things that human beings ought to be trying to escape, such as sitting in a Midwest bar at noon with 'She's a Lady' on the jukebox.
wakka wakka
how commendable that the comedian is able to see the lighter side
the rest of you seem stuck
Metaboloofa
Exfoliate That Weight!
"Before I found Metabaloofa, I couldn't control my cravings. Now, whenever I get hungry, I just take a small bite."
Child: "We call him loofy!" [munches gleefully]
๐ต'Metaboloofa, metaboloofa, go on a diet and wash your pits.'๐ต