Trad wives are predators! ...hear me out. I watched a video from a former trad wife/MAGA/Mormon/White Christian nationalist, and she really walked through this well telling her personal story. Link in comments. But here I’ll summarize for you. First, yes this is an adaptation to living in a time/place/subculture where women are actively prevented from acquiring the skills and resources necessary for caring for themselves. This is an adaptation to being strongly coerced into dependence on your partner. And in the video she tells the story of how she was coerced into this dependence. But, once you have that world setup where women can only get the resources they need via a man, well, then they start to see men through that lens. She spoke about how she did not see men’s personalities, or unique interests, or their compatibility with her, she only saw who came from a rich family, she saw what a man’s college major was and thus what his earning potential would be, etc, etc. She viewed men as resources and went out hunting to find the best resource that she could. She was a predator looking to use a man as a checkbook. And this was also true of the majority of the other single women in her community. This is not only why Mormon women tend to be so fixated on their looks, as this is how they hunt, this is also why these women will leave their husband for another man. When you have a relationship of this type it’s not very fulfilling just on a human level, and so these women are often unhappy and looking for something else. But if the only way they can care for themselves is via a man, well then they have to stay in that bad relationship until they can find a new man to use for his resources. It’s just all around a very ugly setup for everyone. Partnerships > Transactionships

About 20 years ago an ex threatened to blackmail me with some sex tapes that we had made. This was back before revenge porn laws, there wasn’t anything that I could do, and believe it or not, the world was an even more misogynistic place then! It was a very scary time in my life and I remember sitting on the chair in the closet of my studio apartment consoling myself with the knowledge that one day technology will get so good that people will be able to make totally realistic fake videos of anything. And if I just made it to that day then I would be free of his threats. Well, today I saw some AI fakes of Michael Jackson and I realized, that day has arrived! But the interesting thing is, I no longer need to hide behind plausible deniability. If those tapes of me still exist and were they to hit the internet I wouldn’t feel a need to deny it, I would just put the shame where the shame belongs, with him. And that's an even better ending to that drama than I imagined.

Does anyone have decent estimates on daily average users of Nostr? I was chatting with my husband the other day and told him that I had ~1k followers on Nostr and he was shocked. He’s like “isn’t that all of Nostr??” lol But I see people on here that have ~70k followers… can that be right? There are 70k people who use Nostr? Also, it’s rather trivial to write a script to spin up thousands of key pairs, join relays, and follow an account. So, how much of that do we suppose happens here?

We are ghosts in borrowed skin ✨

I went out for business lunch with my husband today. I wore this fabulous silk jumpsuit and as we're leaving I put on my big sunglasses 😎 He notes how glamorous I'm looking and I explain that it's very important to dress and act like you're the main character... and then this bitch says to me "Bruh, we're walking through the Chili's parking lot, keep it real" ☠️

I got Halloween on my mind. Perhaps I'll be a Vulcan ambassador again at this months @San Juan Bit Devs Feels like the right vibe for a Socratic Seminar ya?

Bro got me there for a sec 😂

Someone can not "sleep their way to the top" with out others "at the top" who are willing to compromise their professional integrity for the purposes of getting laid. And that person, "at the top" who compromised their professional integrity had more responsibility and so is the person more at fault in that situation. ...funny how that never gets mentioned huh?

I'm not at all a fan of hierarchical thinking or a status based mindset. I want to say that status is elitist and soulless, but that doesn’t do a very good job of explaining my sadness at the concept. So I’ll try harder... Status is far to simplistic of a way to view others. People are wildly complex, if you view them as a spot on a chart you will miss all that is interesting and energizing about them. You can’t appreciate someone, you can’t learn from them, you can be inspired by them, you can be energized by your interactions with them if you primarily see them as a rung on a ladder that you are climbing. When you have the status glasses on you destroy your ability to appreciate and enjoy others.

I'm in a fabulous mood this morning. I had a great yoga session 🧘🏻‍♀️ I've got a fresh hot cup of tea 🫖 I've got a trip hop mix playing 🎵 I have two monitors 🖥️🖥️ and a strong internet connection 🛜 I'm in the zone, let's do this! 🧡

Correlation is not causation. This is a post about Tylenol.

San Juan BitDevs!!! 🥳🤓🧡 I’m thinking this time instead of discussing filters… again, let’s discuss what makes for a well run open source project. What are good practices for maintainers of open source projects? What are appropriate practices to avoid security issues? How do you maintain transparency? Etc. But also, our core crew of San Juan BitDevs people have been busy working to onboard some local merchants! And we’ll be discussing what tools they’ve been using and how the process is going. I hope to see you there! Please RSVP at one of the below links so that we know how much pizza and booze to bring!

Meetup

Socratic Seminar #20, Wed, Oct 22, 2025, 7:00 PM | Meetup

Inspired by BitDevs meetups worldwide, our Socratic Seminars are where curious minds connect, ideas evolve, and nobody leaves without learning some...

Partiful

BitDevs Socratic Seminar #20 | Partiful

Inspired by BitDevs meetups worldwide, our Socratic Seminars are where curious minds connect, ideas evolve, and nobody leaves without learning some...

Or you know, if you want to be all cool and anon, just DM me and I'll add you to the head count.

When the red pill bros first started popping up in my feed, when they started following me around events trying to lecture me, it bugged me. And when I talked about it often people would say, “You’re just being too sensitive”, “stop being triggered”, “you’re paranoid”. And yet it kept bothering me. And now it’s quite clear why. Because I could tell, my subconscious mind picked up on their intentions. There isn't anything inherently wrong with discussing fertility rates, or modern dating, or what impacts reproductive choices and family structure. All fine. But what is actually happen are people with a specific agenda looking to find a topic that can drum up some fear to push people into a world that they fantasize about. This stuff comes from people who were promised a patriarchal world. A world where they are above women and control women. A world where a wife and kids are trophies to show off. They aren’t interested in what’s good for humanity. Nor are they curious about people’s choices. They are searching for an angle to use to drum up righteous outrage to push people into the world they want. They are searching for a way to push women back into living life as possessions that further someone else’s goals. If you at all care about the lives of women, you can feel that when you talk to them.

Someone managed to get the fabulous TED Talk style picture of me while I was speaking at a conference last week 🤣👏 I feel like I should make this my LinkedIn profile photo... but that's just too cringe 😬

Good morning, please read my long rant on why Miley Cyrus’ Something Beautiful is the most perfect love song. … for me anyhow. It’s starts with setting the scene of a date “water to red wine, kissing to kill time”. Which is excellent as of course red wine is the best drug to take on a hot date. Her and this date are clearly in a deep conversation, which is very much my love language. “Said I don't wanna talk about it for too long. Baby, now I think I do.” This date says or does something that inspires so much trust that she is able to “Send home the guards”. For me this one is a rare treat. I walk through the world with a whole crew of guards, rarely do they get to take a break. And when this date then says “something beautiful” she let’s herself fall into infatuation. “I'm losing my breath”, “I'm so obsessed, yes”. I think when you are younger it’s very scary to get lost in a person. You don’t know how you will find yourself again. But when you’re an old bitch like me, finding a moment where you can even pretend to get lost in someone is quite a treat. It’s a beautiful ride to go on… in the rare moments when you can find it. It’s amazing to get lost in admiration for someone’s best qualities. You know tomorrow morning they will say something harsh, or burp, or do that other thing that really irritates you and you will once again realize their flawed humanity and sober up. But, for tonight you can be completely enamored, you can get lost and “drown in devotion”. But it’s not just the lyrics, the dramatic style of the song captures the moment when you look them in the eye and a wave of desire hits you. It’s all consuming. It’s the date night we’re all striving for 🍷💥😍🫶