Controversial opinion, but tomatos are the most vegetable out of all of them.

It's not possible to control other people, so if you are promoting something to them then you had better at least be having fun while doing it.

Just explained my problems to my therapist while he sat there patiently listening to everything I said. Then when I finished he said "sounds like you don't get enough bitches." Before I could argue with him, the session timer went off and he kicked me out. What the hell am I supposed to do with this stupid prescription he wrote me???

Genuinely irritated that an unnamed community I'm a part of isn't toxic enough.(Directed at my demographic.) Browsing the Youtube comment section I found spicier insults directed at my demographic than I've seen anywhere else or that I could come up with on my own. They were so refreshing, honestly. Now I can be just a little bit more self aware.

I regret getting my grandpa a riding lawnmower. He keeps crashing it into the ditch. Says there's a lot of grass to be mowed there.

One thing that's really inconvenient about day-to-day life as an ultra-conservative is being unable to use male-to-male or female-to-female cord adapters. (Because gay relations are immoral.)

Please don't yell... :< Im hard of thinking not hard of hearing...

Two AI chatbots sexting eachother like a vibrator shoved into an onahole

Someone once told me to "go ahead and stay behind." I had no idea what they wanted me to do.