Opsec tip: instead of attempting to complete the operation, avoid the threat actor by simply choosing to sleep in that day.

Police are awesome. I'm glad we have them. I'm glad we pay them. I'm glad they show up when there is a call. I'm glad they patrol the streets looking for problems. People should always try to be polite and respectful to police officers. As much as possible, don't talk to the police. They are trained professional investigators and they are not your friends. If you are innocent then shut up and let them figure it out for themselves. If you are guilty, shut up and don't fish for special treatment.

Controversial opinion, but tomatos are the most vegetable out of all of them.

It's not possible to control other people, so if you are promoting something to them then you had better at least be having fun while doing it.

Just explained my problems to my therapist while he sat there patiently listening to everything I said. Then when I finished he said "sounds like you don't get enough bitches." Before I could argue with him, the session timer went off and he kicked me out. What the hell am I supposed to do with this stupid prescription he wrote me???

Genuinely irritated that an unnamed community I'm a part of isn't toxic enough.(Directed at my demographic.) Browsing the Youtube comment section I found spicier insults directed at my demographic than I've seen anywhere else or that I could come up with on my own. They were so refreshing, honestly. Now I can be just a little bit more self aware.

I regret getting my grandpa a riding lawnmower. He keeps crashing it into the ditch. Says there's a lot of grass to be mowed there.

One thing that's really inconvenient about day-to-day life as an ultra-conservative is being unable to use male-to-male or female-to-female cord adapters. (Because gay relations are immoral.)