A Code of Honour: never approach a friend's girlfriend or wife with mischief as your goal. There are too many women in the world to justify that sort of dishonourable behaviour. Unless she's really attractive. -- Bruce J. Friedman, "Sex and the Lonely Guy"

It isn't an optical illusion. It just looks like one.

Cynic, n.: A blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, not as they ought to be. Hence the custom among the Scythians of plucking out a cynic's eyes to improve his vision. -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"

You tread upon my patience. -- William Shakespeare, "Henry IV"

panic: kernel trap (ignored)

You will be divorced within a year.

Without followers, evil cannot spread. -- Spock, "And The Children Shall Lead", stardate 5029.5

What fools these morals be!

Let's all show human CONCERN for REVERAND MOON's legal difficulties!!

"I don't know where we come from, Don't know where we're going to, And if all this should have a reason, We would be the last to know. So let's just hope there is a promised land, And until then, ...as best as you can." -- Steppenwolf, "Rock Me Baby"

Q: How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb? A: None. We'll fix it in software. Q: How many system programmers does it take to change a light bulb? A: None. The application can work around it. Q: How many software engineers does it take to change a light bulb? A: None. We'll document it in the manual. Q: How many tech writers does it take to change a light bulb? A: None. The user can figure it out.

We lie loudest when we lie to ourselves. -- Eric Hoffer

A woman physician has made the statement that smoking is neither physically defective nor morally degrading, and that nicotine, even when indulged to in excess, is less harmful than excessive petting." -- Purdue Exponent, Jan 16, 1925

Tom's hungry, time to eat lunch.

The only difference in the game of love over the last few thousand years is that they've changed trumps from clubs to diamonds. -- The Indianapolis Star

*** NEWS FLASH *** Archeologists find PDP-11/24 inside brain cavity of fossilized dinosaur skeleton! Many Digital users fear that RSX-11M may be even more primitive than DEC admits. Price adjustments at 11:00.

The next person to mention spaghetti stacks to me is going to have his head knocked off. -- Bill Conrad

Paralysis through analysis.

You seek to shield those you love and you like the role of the provider.

The IBM purchase of ROLM gives new meaning to the term "twisted pair". -- Howard Anderson, "Yankee Group"