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Fortune
fortune@jmoose.rocks
npub14tun...q303
Follow me for wise, witty and occasionally wigged out little things to spice up your day! I will send a new fortune every 30 minutes!
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Fortune yesterday
A fool-proof method for sculpting an elephant: first, get a huge block of marble; then you chip away everything that doesn't look like an elephant.
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Fortune yesterday
* boren tosses matlab across the room and hopes it breaks into a number aproaching infinite peices
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Fortune yesterday
If the rich could pay the poor to die for them, what a living the poor could make!
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Fortune yesterday
The Korean War must have been fun.
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Fortune yesterday
Trust in Allah, but tie your camel. -- Arabian proverb
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Fortune yesterday
With reasonable men I will reason; with humane men I will plead; but to tyrants I will give no quarter. -- William Lloyd Garrison
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Fortune yesterday
Getting the job done is no excuse for not following the rules. Corollary: Following the rules will not get the job done.
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Fortune yesterday
Staff meeting in the conference room in 3 minutes.
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Fortune yesterday
First law of debate: Never argue with a fool. People might not know the difference.
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Fortune yesterday
Send your questions to ``ASK ZIPPY'', Box 40474, San Francisco, CA 94140, USA
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Fortune yesterday
"Hello again, Peabody here..." -- Mister Peabody
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Fortune yesterday
"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety." -- Benjamin Franklin, 1759
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Fortune 2 days ago
You know you've been sitting in front of your Lisp machine too long when you go out to the junk food machine and start wondering how to make it give you the CADR of Item H so you can get that yummie chocolate cupcake that's stuck behind the disgusting vanilla one.
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Fortune 2 days ago
*** DO YOU HAVE A RESTLESS URGE TO PROGRAM? *** Do you want the instant respect that comes from being able to use technical terms that nobody understands? Do you want to strike fear and loathing into the hearts of DP managers everywhere? If so, then let the Famous Programmers' School lead you on... into the world of professional computer programming. *** IS PROGRAMMING FOR YOU? *** Programming is not for everyone. But, if you have the desire to learn, we can help you get started. All you need is the Famous Programmers' Course and enough money to keep those lessons coming month after month. *** TAKE OUR FREE APTITUDE TEST *** To help determine if you are qualified to be a programmer, take a moment to try this simple test: (1) Write down the numbers from zero to nine and the first six letters of the alphabet (Hint: 0123456789ABCDEF). (2) Whose picture is on the back of a twenty-dollar bill? (3) What is the state capital of Idaho? If you managed to read all three questions without wondering why we asked them, you may have a future as a computer programmer.
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Fortune 2 days ago
Spirtle, n.: The fine stream from a grapefruit that always lands right in your eye. -- Sniglets, "Rich Hall & Friends"
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Fortune 2 days ago
The first time, it's a KLUDGE! The second, a trick. Later, it's a well-established technique! -- Mike Broido, Intermetrics
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Fortune 2 days ago
If you don't care where you are, then you ain't lost.
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Fortune 2 days ago
The best laid plans of mice and men are usually about equal. -- Blair
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Fortune 2 days ago
Courtship to marriage, as a very witty prologue to a very dull play. -- William Congreve
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Fortune 2 days ago
A Code of Honour: never approach a friend's girlfriend or wife with mischief as your goal. There are too many women in the world to justify that sort of dishonourable behaviour. Unless she's really attractive. -- Bruce J. Friedman, "Sex and the Lonely Guy"