Fourth Law of Applied Terror: The night before the English History mid-term, your Biology instructor will assign 200 pages on planaria. Corollary: Every instructor assumes that you have nothing else to do except study for that instructor's course.

Marriage always demands the greatest understanding of the art of insincerity possible between two human beings. -- Vicki Baum

QOTD: "I've always wanted to work in the Federal Mint. And then go on strike. To make less money."

Q: How can I choose what groups to post in? ... Q: How about an example? A: Ok. Let's say you want to report that Gretzky has been traded from the Oilers to the Kings. Now right away you might think rec.sport.hockey would be enough. WRONG. Many more people might be interested. This is a big trade! Since it's a NEWS article, it belongs in the news.* hierarchy as well. If you are a news admin, or there is one on your machine, try news.admin. If not, use news.misc. The Oilers are probably interested in geology, so try sci.physics. He is a big star, so post to sci.astro, and sci.space because they are also interested in stars. Next, his name is Polish sounding. So post to soc.culture.polish. But that group doesn't exist, so cross-post to news.groups suggesting it should be created. With this many groups of interest, your article will be quite bizarre, so post to talk.bizarre as well. (And post to comp.std.mumps, since they hardly get any articles there, and a "comp" group will propagate your article further.) You may also find it is more fun to post the article once in each group. If you list all the newsgroups in the same article, some newsreaders will only show the the article to the reader once! Don't tolerate this. -- Brad Templeton, _Emily Postnews Answers Your Questions on Netiquette_

Age is a tyrant who forbids, at the penalty of life, all the pleasures of youth.

Would you care to view the ruins of my good intentions?

Freshest if eaten before date on carton.

> I thing you're missing the capability of Makefiles. It takes several _hours_ to do `make' a second time on my machine with the latest glibc sources (and no files are recompiled a second time). I think I'll remove `build' after changing one file if I want to recompile it. -- Juan Cespedes <cespedes@debian.org>

In the long run we are all dead. -- John Maynard Keynes

The Martian Canals were clearly the Martian's last ditch effort!

* joeyh_ wonders if linux is supposed to lock up when you ask 100 processes to cat the entire cd drive

It's not hard to admit errors that are [only] cosmetically wrong. -- J. K. Galbraith

We cannot command nature except by obeying her. -- Sir Francis Bacon

Being ugly isn't illegal. Yet.

There is much Obi-Wan did not tell you. -- Darth Vader

The F-15 Eagle: If it's up, we'll shoot it down. If it's down, we'll blow it up. -- A McDonnell-Douglas ad from a few years ago

You are lost in the Swamps of Despair.

In Devon, Connecticut, it is unlawful to walk backwards after sunset.

The `loner' may be respected, but he is always resented by his colleagues, for he seems to be passing a critical judgment on them, when he may be simply making a limiting statement about himself. -- Sidney Harris

The magician is seated in his high chair and looks upon the world with favor. He is at the height of his powers. If he closes his eyes, he causes the world to disappear. If he opens his eyes, he causes the world to come back. If there is harmony within him, the world is harmonious. If rage shatters his inner harmony, the unity of the world is shattered. If desire arises within him, he utters the magic syllables that causes the desired object to appear. His wishes, his thoughts, his gestures, his noises command the universe. -- Selma Fraiberg, _The Magic Years_, pg. 107