Gregory Bader 🦍🌺's avatar
Gregory Bader 🦍🌺
gregory@primal.net
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Functional Patterns @junglebiomechanics @bitcoinbiomechanics @virtualbiomechanics @junglebiomechanicsretreat @junglerunners
The deep squat is often treated as the gold standard of mobility, but forcing that position can actually work against how the body produces force. When people drop into deep squats passively, gravity is doing most of the work. This creates range by overly lengthening tissues rather than building the strength to control those positions. Over time that can make the joints more flaccid and reduce the body’s ability to generate force in deeper ranges. Sprinting works in the opposite direction. As you improve your ability to produce and transfer force through the body, you naturally gain usable range of motion where it matters. Develop the capacity to sprint well, and deep ranges become strong and controlled rather than passive and unstable. #functionalpatterns #sprintingisking
THE VIRTUAL PERSONAL TRAINING PROGRAM The Virtual Personal Training Program is a monthly, virtual personal training membership designed for people committed to becoming more functional in every area of life. Members receive personalized training sessions (4 or 8 per month), accountability checks, structured habit guidance, and access to around the clock support. This membership is a lifestyle overhaul designed to rebuild you from the ground up - physically and mentally. The Rules: 💧 100% Clean Diet 🚫 Complete Sobriety 📵 No Porn / Masturbation / Mindless Scrolling 💪 100% Functional Patterns Training 🌅 Live Intentionally This is my most expensive, most exclusive membership type but the value that you get is absolutely high end. If you become a member you also get discounted access to the Unlimited Virtual Group Class Membership (only $50/month) and free access to the monthly FP Equipment Classes. Join using the links below: #functionalpatterns
THE UNLIMITED VIRTUAL GROUP CLASS MEMBERSHIP The Unlimited Virtual Group Class Membership includes 16 live (via Zoom) virtual group classes per week. As part of your membership you can attend as many of these classes as you’d like. I offer three class types: Dynamic, Corrective, and Myofascial Release. This membership is great for beginners and advanced FP students alike. The cost of this membership is $100/month but if you pay using Bitcoin the price drops to $55/month worth of Bitcoin: Class Schedule: M - Dynamics @ 5am, 8am, 5pm CST T - Correctives @ 5am, 8am, 5pm CST W - MFR @ 5am, 8am, 5pm CST Th - Dynamics @ 5am, 8am, 5pm CST F - Correctives @ 5am, 8am, 5pm CST Sa - Dynamics @ 8am Su - Recovery Day (No classes) Class Descriptions🦾 🏃Dynamics Classes - These classes are catered to the most athletic clients that are looking to take their fitness to the next level. You will practice rotational movements using equipment like slam balls, dumbbells, resistance bands, and maces. After this class you will feel fatigued and sore but ready for more! ⚙️Correctives Classes - These classes are perfect for beginners but are great for members of all levels to attend consistently. In these classes you will learn exercises that effectively improve breathing, posture, muscle chain integration, and basic movements that will prepare you for the next level of dynamic classes. These classes are great if you are dealing with injuries or pain. 🌊Myofascial Release Classes - In these classes you will learn about Myofascial Release (MFR). MFR techniques are useful tools in the re-tensioning process. MFR improves connective tissue hydration and muscular tissue responsiveness. After taking this class you should feel sore like you worked out, yet able to move with a higher quality joint range of motion. #functionalpatterns
THE INTEGRATION SERIES The Integration Series is a 10-class follow along of the Functional Patterns Online 10-Week Course. The classes are every Saturday at 9am CST, conducted via Zoom. The entire series (all 10 classes) costs only $50. Here is the Integration Series schedule: CYCLE 1: Starts 2nd Saturday of January CYCLE 2: Starts 2nd Saturday of April CYCLE 3: Starts 2nd Saturday of July CYCLE 4: Starts 2nd Saturday of October ***You must have purchased the FP Online 10-Week Course to participate in this series. #functionalpatterns
EQUIPMENT CLASSES I now offer 1 live (via Zoom) group class per month where I instruct attendees on how to set up and use specific Functional Patterns tools/equipment! The classes will be every last Sunday of each month at 8:00am CST. Each class costs $20 and are the cheapest and easiest way to train with me. Check out the schedule!: JANUARY: FP FUNCTIONECK FEBRUARY: FP RG BELLS MARCH: FP BANDS APRIL: BARBELL/WEIGHT PLATES MAY: FP RG BAR JUNE: FP MFR TOOLS JULY: FP LEG STRAP AUGUST: DUMBBELLS/KETTLEBELLS SEPTEMBER: FP MACES/CLUBS OCTOBER: FP REGEN TRAINER NOVEMBER: FP LEVERAGE KING DECEMBER: FP TORQUE STRAP Here is the link to sign up for those classes: #functionalpatterns
We are so grateful to everyone who came out today to celebrate Gianna’s 2nd birthday with us. We truly appreciate you being there🙏
Jumping is often recommended to improve bone density, but without proper movement mechanics it can do more harm than good. Conditions like osteoporosis and osteopenia don't appear overnight. They often develop over years of poor movement patterns that place uneven stress on the body. If joints are already painful or basic movements feel unstable, adding impact before addressing how you move can increase strain instead of building resilience. Before jumping becomes beneficial, the body has to be organized to absorb and redistribute force properly. Training the FP First 4 helps coordinate the legs, ribs, and spine so impact can be handled safely, allowing bone density to develop in a way that is sustainable over time. #functionalpatterns #functionaljumping