5:55 AM. Good morning 🔥 From the front of morning fire 24. Hope you have a great day! 11.4.25

"Is it enough only to go 'back in time' and remember oneself as a small child to see that our ordinary thoughts are not our Self. It is only enough to remember how we confronted ultimate reality as children--the reality of death and injury--to see that our everyday thoughts, even our careful, logical thinking, are not the self, not the soul. When the young child needs to understand, when you or I need to understand a mystery, and ultimate fact, an overpowering reality, then and only then do we taste the begining of a new kind of thinking that comes from the inner self. Such thinking has very little in common with the views and opinions that fly in and out of the socially conditioned mind." -- Jacob Needleman, Tine and the Soul (2003) I didn't sleep well last night. I fell asleep in the recliner at 10. At 11 I woke up, brushed and flossed my teeth, swished some mouthwash, said goodnight to everyone, gave Annie a kiss, and went to bed. 3 AM I was up worrying and couldn't fall back asleep. I go through phases like this. I think it's my soul communicating I need to course correct. I straighten up and pay attention, or I suffer more. It has communicated like this for as long as I can remember. It's a mystery. As much as I don't like the experience l like the mystery of it. One time when it happened I begged God to tell me what I need to do. I got an answer. "Keep writing" I calmed down and fell asleep on the couch. Sometimes I will grab Annie's arm, lay it across my chest and scratch it. I listen to a Zen Monk on YouTube. When anxiety becomes to overwhelming for him he works to remind himself that all there is Now and the relationship he is sharing at the moment. Course correction. Focus on what matters. I was talk to a guy at work the other day. He's having insomnia. He's on blood pressure pills and anti anxiety medicine. I made sure to tell him that I go through the same thing, but to a lesser degree. When I started reading Daniel Quinn, or as we say nowadays went down the rabbit hole, as far as one can go with dialup internet and physical books, he mentioned the Age of Anxiety in one of his essays. It started in the 1950's. When my parents were hiding under their desks at school doing drills in case of a nuclear attack. It was relief to read that. That it wasn't me who was just prone to anxiety. The whole damn culture was riddled with it. Literature can be a lifeline. I have been pondering this idea: We are children of parents. We are children of culture. We are children of nature. Quinn spoke to the child in nature in me back at the turn of the century. He masterfully helped me understand why we are doing what we are doing to the earth. God it was relief to hear it. I think the only way he got through was my socially conditioned self was rattled enough in my late teens, early 20's that I had ears to listen. Or to say it another way, the child of culture was disarmed and confused. I may be barking up the wrong tree this morning, but I'm going to keep barking. I need sleep so I can be present for my family and community, Morning fire #22 11.3.25

"Is it enough only to go 'back in time' and remember oneself as a small child to see that our ordinary thoughts are not our Self. It is only enough to remember how we confronted ultimate reality as children--the reality of death and injury--to see that our everyday thoughts, even our careful, logical thinking, are not the self, not the soul. When the young child needs to understand, when you or I need to understand a mystery, and ultimate fact, an overpowering reality, then and only then do we taste the begining of a new kind of thinking that comes from the inner self. Such thinking has very little in common with the views and opinions that fly in and out of the socially conditioned mind." -- Jacob Needleman, Tine and the Soul (2003)

Good morning. I'm in front of morning fire 22. I am thinking about Bitcoin. Two people messaged me yesterday about it. The first one reads: "Hello! I’ve been meaning to write to you for awhile, thanking you for my first foray into crypto… but I just got something from a hacked duplicate page someone has set up in your name. Hope you and yours are all more than well and I look forward to meeting you officially some day…" --- I don't know if this message is real. I am not friends with this person. I hope it is. It's a kind message. But it also might be a duplicate page. I usually don't send people messages on messenger unless they message me first. Definitely not unsolicited messages about Bitcoin. To be clear, I am not into crypto, just Bitcoin. From the beginning people smarter than me said to stay away from anything but Bitcoin. After 3 years of education and buying it I understand why. ---- The second comment reads: "So, how is a Bitcoin loan repaid? On the increased value of your bitcoin? We are a no-debt household so taking a traditional loan is not something we would choose to do." ---- We are a no-debt household too. I've never taken out a Bitcoin loan. The way I understand it Strike will loan you 50% of the value of the Bitcoin you put up for collateral. So if I put up 10 grand they'll loan me 5. No credit checks etc. I guess you can have the loan in 15 minutes. I think the interest rates are around 10%. I also think you can only take out a 1 year loan. I asked Joel Bomgar about it one time. He's a Bitcoin Sherpa. He said DON'T borrow against your Bitcoin. Because if it drops below the value of the amount you put up for collateral they can liquidate your Bitcoin to cover the loan. So you lose your Bitcoin. There are people that put up PART of their Bitcoin stack as collateral, borrow enough to live on, and buy Bitcoin with the cash they would be putting into their living expenses. The value of Bitcoin is growing at an average of 50% a year, so you could have enough to pay off your loan at 10% with extra Bitcoin to boot. I recommend listening to Jack Maller's Mailbag Monday shows at 5 PM CST. He's the CEO of Strike, young, and gifted at communicating all things Bitcoin. ----- That's all I got to say about that for right now. It's 34 degrees out there. The fire is still burning in front of me. There's a Full Moon coming up in a couple of days. We bought fencing to expand our pasture. Hoping to get some of it fenced before the ground freezes so the goats can start eating buckthorn. It's all over the place on route 12, our mail route, the one I deliver. It's one of the last woody plants to lose its leaves. So you can see it growing deep in the forests and swamps right now. I don't know how it will ever be stopped. Anyway, I hope you have a great Sunday! 11.2.25

From a private message: "Hey Curt, I see you post about crypto and Bitcoin a lot How do you get started? And I was wondering is that website like kraken any good?" I only post about Bitcoin. There is only Bitcoin to me. Bitcoin is not crypto to me. I won't even look at the other coins. There is Bitcoin and everything else. When you look into Bitcoin you will understand what I am talking about. It's a different animal. To be comfortable buying Bitcoin you have to educate yourself, or it will go nowhere for you. It'll just be another investment that you hope goes up someday. It's bigger than that. I've heard of Kraken, but that's about it. Never looked into it. We buy our Bitcoin on exchanges. We use Swan and Strike. We use Strike a lot more now. They will exchange our Bitcoin for US Dollars (fiat) and pay our bills for us. They will also loan us money against our Bitcoin to pay our bills. That way we don't have to sell our Bitcoin. You never want to sell your Bitcoin if you can help it. Because it is engineered to continuously go up in value. Off to the mail trail. My last day, then 2 days off. I hope you have a great day! Morning fire #21 11.1.25

Twenty two out there. The lower the temps the more thankful I am for this fire and dry firewood. I took this picture at 5:50 AM. Been up since 4:30 AM. No alarm clock. It seems once fire burning season starts I'm awake at that time. It's either get up, start a fire, go to work, or be cold and hungry. I looked out the window and saw stars this morning. Hoping to see more sun on the mail trail today. And I hope you have a great day. Fire #13 10.24.25

How Bitcoin Saved Me From Despair (40 min.)

My takeaway: To die well we must have your own myth. We're a story. A fiction. Continuously editing that myth. Fantasy is reality.

5:51 AM. Good morning. It's 39 and lightly raining out there. That's what Google says anyway. I haven't been out there yet. It was wet, windy, and chilly when I worked out last night. Assuming it hasn't changed. More thoughts on Bitcoin. People ask me what it is. It's a computer network and protocol invented by a genius. He released it to the world and disappeared forever. Some say he had to. Otherwise his life would have been ruined. His name was: Satoshi Nakamoto. I bought some this morning at 107K a coin. I try to buy a little each day, even if it's $10 worth. Been doing it for over 3 years now. Part of the future looks brighter with Bitcoin. That's the way it looks from in here anyway. Off to the mail trail. I hope you have a great time day! Morning fire #11 10.22.25

I started buying Bitcoin 3 years ago. I bought a little because people who stayed politically centered during the Covid lockdowns were talking about it. These were people who understood there were two movies playing on one screen. They didn't get sucked in emotionally so much and were looking for a third way out. Most of them were financially successful I believe. Solid middle class. And as you know that demographic is just about gone. I came to the conclusion, through online observation, that people looking for a third way out tend to gravitate towards Bitcoin. So following their lead I bought some. Then I started educating myself by listening to Bitcoin podcasts and books on the mail route. I was taking in well over 20 hours of Bitcoin content a week. Still do sometimes. Plus I was desperate. My Dad just died (my first purchase was on the day of his memorial service). Annie was getting ready to quit her full time mail carrier job so she could be at home with our homeschooled kids. We needed capital to start our native plant nursery. And I'm a curious person by nature. They say people above 40 come to Bitcoin because they are curious by nature and/or desperate. So that was luckily me. I say luckily because Bitcoin has helped us financially. We're able to keep the bills paid. Without it we'd be in pretty tough shape. With Annie quitting the Post Office and inflation I don't think we could make it. Things are still tight, but they would be much worse I think. I don't even think about the stock market or any another interest bearing asset if we have extra money to put away for a rainy day. Nothing performs like Bitcoin. Everything you stick into it doubles roughly in 18 months. I have no interest in owning second best. I laughingly tell people if they see us living on the street they'll know why. Yet from what I have learned Bitcoin just makes sense. The more unstable The Dollar becomes the stronger Bitcoin becomes. And at this point I don't see any saving The Dollar. Our country is so far in debt that it will never be paid off. They are printing money just to keep the government solvent. So Bitcoin, to me, will only get stronger. Nothing stops this train, as Lyn Alden says.

Ordinary people tend to give advice, which is more about them than the person they want to help. They often fail to separate their own lives and values from the person they are talking to. ~ Thomas Moore

The human heart and body do not obey the rationality that our modern world worships. ~ Jacob Needleman

From my journal entry on August 27th, 2022 (3 years ago today): "Stopped in after work and had dinner with Grandma, David (my uncle), and Mom. We talked a bit about Bitcoin and the market dropping. Told them it was a good time to get in with it dropping below $20,000 a coin today" I checked the price this morning. It's just over $111K. Crazy.

A hummingbird visits an obedient plant. A friend of Bean Brook Nursery took this photo the other day. Like usual, she said we could use it. A month from now, if all goes well, the hummingbird will be somewhere south and the obedient plant gone to seed. We saw a hummingbird visiting a volunteer evening primrose by our front deck early this morning. I'm seeing some people report on social media the hummingbirds they've been seeing are gone. We had a customer stop in just after we opened. All is well on the front. One a day keeps the worry away. It's chilly out there. High fifties. Cloudy, gray, gusts of wind. A taste of fall. A good time to pile firewood. And that's what I'm going to go do. Until next time. 8.24.25

I took this photo on the mail route yesterday. It's sumac. It reminded me fall is near. We didn't have any customers yesterday. Things tend to slow down this time of year. They shouldn't, when it comes to planting natives, but they do. I planted 4 bluestems in the front meadow last evening . . . 2 big and 2 little. I looked up the latin meaning of big blue stem the other day. I can't remember exactly what it was but an image of an old man with a long beard comes to mind. Oh, yeah, back to the meadow. It's dry. Cutting through the soil with my soil knife is getting more difficult by the day. The soil I put back in the hole is gritty and dusty. Doesn't hold together at all. I'm off the mail trail. Hope you have a great day! 8.7.25

Money sovereignty, to me, is money not controlled by human beings. #Bitcoin

Scrolling through Facebook I see this commentary and photo from a customer: "Rattlesnake Master! Bought from Bean Brook Nursery. It’s had a hard couple of years - so I’m thrilled it hung on and is now ready to bloom!* This is our 3rd season growing and selling native plants and shrubs. This season has been a challenge. There's a lot of places we can look for inspiration and encouragement. Today we look to one of the plants we grew from seed. Why not? Plants are persistent. Without them we are nothing.

From the front meadow last evening. Black eyed susans blooming with lance leaf coreopsis. This is the most yellow we've had sprinkled through the meadow. The black eyed susans are popping up where we've thrown seed or past plants have dropped them. We never really know. The plants do what they want to do. We learn the best we can from them. 7.2.25