When i was really young people used to be eager to post their relationship status on fb. Now its a total shock if a girl hard launches a guy on insta. Its soft launch or no launch at all. Hiding faces, etc. I've def noticed the shift and so this article was interesting to me.
Here are some things I agree with.
1. That the dating landscape is really bad.
2. Its now uncool to be the boyfriend girl.
3. Even partnered women lament men and hetrosexuality (why is everyone bi now?)
4. Girls romantize being single and no one is afraid of the old spinster with cats thing.
So is having a boyfriend embarassing? No, but here's what I think happened.
1. You used to get clout for being partnered - being claimed by a man meant you were "one of the good ones" it affirmed your womanhood and brought real tangible benefits like a home, a place in society, etc.
2. The hey girly messages. I've had this happen to me before. You date a guy for like a year so you think you are safe, you post him only to have a "hey girly" message appear in your dm. "Hey girly, I just thought I should let you know your bf has been sending me snaps for 3 months, he said he wasn't in a relationship". It doesn't even have to be that extreme, just the feeling of going to a popular influencer's page and seeing your bf amongst her likes. How many times have you heard your besties say they want a guy with no social media? ALL THE TIME. I even feel that way, i would love for my next boyfriend to have no social media presence and to never be caught dead in someones dms.
3. Here's my last one, and i think some people won't like hearing this but one of the reasons girls don't want to post their bfs anymore is because they aren't their bfs. They're in a situationship. She knows there are other girls so if she were to post him she would open herself up to ridicule so she has no choice but enjoy her humiliationship in private.
The fix? IDK. How do you make having a bf cool? I don't think you can.
Vogue
Is Having a Boyfriend Embarrassing Now?
“Being partnered doesn’t affirm your womanhood anymore,” writes Chanté Joseph. “It is no longer considered an achievement and, if anything...
