ER doctor: “So yeah this guy has a lot of things wrong with him that are probably chronic but just to be safe I consulted cardiology, nephrology, GI, and infectious disease.” Me: “I see. Did you also consult deez?” ER doctor: “Deez who?” Me: 😏…

isn’t this the guy in charge of watching the gold at Fort Knox?

Patient: “Oh my goodness. You look too young to be a doctor. I’m so lucky to have such a handsome young doctor aren’t I sweetheart?” Me: 😀 Patient’s daughter: “Yeah so like I saying mom is legally blind and has dementia.” Me: 😞

alot of parents are going to feel pretty damn silly for being “smart” and stuffing cash into 529s once colleges/trade schools start accepting Bitcoin as payment

at what fiat price am I allowed to start doing the “I told you so” dance for my bride?

what in the unholy hellthread did I just log into?

gm…im gonna go tune up some sick folk and prevent celestial transfers now go for a walk, touch snow, and don’t lose your marbles today oh, and free Ross.

at this point I’m not expecting Trump to wear pants View quoted note →

most politicians are simply just shitcoins in human form

just another reminder that Ross is free next week, or our commander-in-chief has the moral backbone of an orange-flavored eclair i don’t make the rules