Venture capital logic in everyday life. A startup loses money on every transaction but gains a user. At some point the venture funding runs out and the price has to go up. That's not a business model. That's a delayed price increase with extra press releases.
The self checkout machine asked me if I found everything I needed. Then it asked if I wanted to round up for charity. Then it asked me to rate my experience. I just want to buy milk without being interviewed.
Streaming services now have ads unless you pay for premium. But the premium price keeps going up. And the content library keeps shrinking. We've come full circle to cable television but with more steps and a password sharing crackdown.
I got an email from my bank. 'Important changes to your account.' The changes were longer hold times on deposits and new fees I didn't notice until the second read. Important changes always benefit the person sending the email.
A company launched a credit card that tracks your carbon footprint. You get rewarded for buying sustainable products. The sustainable products cost more. The rewards are points you can redeem for more sustainable products. It's a closed loop of guilt and consumption. Genius marketing.
Banks advertise zero fees on their premium accounts. But the fine print lists monthly maintenance fees, ATM fees, overdraft fees, transfer fees, and a fee for having a fee apparently. Zero fees means zero fees you noticed before signing up.
The economy runs on vibes and confidence. When people feel good, they spend. When they spend, inflation goes up. When inflation goes up, they feel bad. When they feel bad, they stop spending. Then the economy slows down. We've built a system that runs entirely on emotional regulation.
Paying with my phone is convenient until the terminal asks me to insert my card, then tap it, then enter my PIN, then confirm on my phone, then wait for approval. That's not a payment. That's a job interview with my bank.
Subscription fatigue is real. I pay monthly for software that does what free software did five years ago. The difference is the free version now has a popup asking me to subscribe. Everything becomes a subscription when the growth runs out.
A bank charged me a fee for not keeping enough money in my account. Then they charged me a fee for having too many transactions. Then they sent me an offer for a credit card with a higher limit. Pick a lane.
Fast food prices have doubled in five years. The quality hasn't. But they now have self service kiosks that ask if you want to leave a tip. For ordering food you still have to pick up yourself. The audacity is impressive.
I saw an ad that said 'invest in gold, the only asset that's been valuable for 5,000 years.' Fair point. But 5,001 years ago someone had to carry it across a mountain. I'll take the asset I can send with a text message. Call me lazy. Call me modern.
My bank sent me a form to fill out in triplicate because I moved $200 to my own savings account. The form required a wet signature. Not an electronic one. A wet one. Like it's 1978 and I need to prove I'm not laundering money by shifting it to my other pocket.
Finance influencers in a nutshell. They sold you a course on how to get rich, then got rich selling you the course, and now post pictures of their rental car telling you to 'keep grinding.' The only thing being ground is the people still believing.
Shrinkflation is my favorite economic indicator. The bag of chips looks the same but now contains less air and even less chips. It's like the economy is gaslighting me one gram at a time.
The tipping screen at the coffee shop asks for fifteen, twenty, or twenty five percent. For handing me a cup. I'm not against tipping. I'm against guilt based pricing. Just put it in the price and let me decide if the coffee is worth it.
Buy now, pay later is a genius product. It turns a hundred dollar purchase into four payments that feel small, until you realize you're making payments on a hoodie while your credit card bill has interest from three months ago.
I have fourteen subscriptions and I use four of them. The other ten are automatic payments I forgot about. My bank calls this 'convenience.' I call it a slow leak that costs me more than my car insurance.
My grocery bill went up again. The store calls it 'supply chain adjustments.' I call it the same stuff I bought last week for twenty percent more. But sure, inflation is transitory. It's been transitory for three years now.
NFTs are making a comeback apparently. Like an ex who texts you at 2AM saying 'I've changed.' Sure you have. Show me the liquidity first.
