Come join me today at 4pm Mountain time! I'll be live on Positive Talk Radio. I'm so excited for this interview!!
We'll be talking about narcissistic abuse, healing, and all the misunderstandings in these things. You'll also get to hear some of my story and much, much more!
Watch the show and interact live with us! Love to have you there!
Link to watch is below.
https://youtube.com/live/UfB1Hy8MKlo?feature=share 
As much as we may want and hope for narcissists to change, the reality is that they will not. It's just as hard if not harder for a narcissist to suddenly become a caring person as it would be for someone who's caring to suddenly be evil and abusive. It's probably just not going to happen.
So many times we don't even realize the amount of chaos we're in until we're not in that relationship anymore. Toxic people live and breathe in chaos. If there always seems to be a problem, something's not right. We don't have to live in or participate in anyone else's chaos. Choose yourself and your peace!
Many people in our lives after toxic relationships may not be the healthiest or people we want to spend more time with. We don't necessarily need to end these relationships, although distance is often helpful. They may not all be toxic, although many may not be healthy. Compassion for everyone makes all of this less miserable.
Forgiving myself has been one of the hardest things I've ever done and there are many layers to this. It's a lifelong process, rather than being something that is ever accomplished. This is also something that you allow yourself to do. It is not something you can force yourself to do. The "WORK" is mostly allowing ourselves to have the thoughts and feelings without making them or us wrong or bad.
I help survivors of narcissistic abuse reclaim their independence and manage their minds.
Narcissists will be angry and vindictive if we are simply happy, unless they can take credit for it. Any other joy we have in our lives they will resent us for. They are miserable and they want us to be more miserable than they are. Allow them to angry and be happy anyway. Focus on you and your life!
Most of us want to fix or heal our relationships at least in the beginning. With narcissists it's not only not worth it, but it won't work. They and any relationship with them is beyond repair. The only thing we can do is minimize the damage if we must stay. It's always better to get out if we can though.
Narcissists will do anything they can to keep you tethered in their life. They won’t pick up stuff, won’t sign paperwork or anything else they can do to keep some control in your life. Do whatever you need to do to cut the ties. They won't let go easily. We must set and hold the boundaries to remove them and the ties to us.
Don't ever think, "They won't use that against me" because they will. They will catalogue everything they can about you and make up the rest. Ultimately it will all be used against you at some point and then forever continuously. Reacting as little as possible is one of the best defenses. Getting out of the relationship and away from them is best if and when we can do this.
Narcissists project everything onto everyone else. They absolutely refuse to take any accountability. It also helps them create more confusion and chaos, which keeps them in control. We don’t have to own anything that’s not ours to own, even if they blame us anyway, which they will. Hold boundaries firm!
Narcissists will deny us everything we ask for, especially to simply treat us like a human being. No matter what we ask for or demand, they will not give it to us. They will continue to expect everything from us including compliance and silence. We all deserve more than this. Don’t accept less!
I help survivors of narcissistic abuse reclaim their independence and manage their minds. Healing is inevitable when you have the right tools and support.
Shoutout to my exes. If it wasn’t for everything they put me through I wouldn’t be who I am and I finally like me. I don’t appreciate the abuse and all the garbage, but it helped me increase my compassion for myself and others. I also wouldn’t wish this experience on anyone else including them.
I help survivors of narcissistic abuse reclaim their independence and manage their minds. Healing is inevitable when you have the right tools and support.
Their words are designed to stab and cut us down, but in a way that no one else can see it. They learn everything about you to be able to use all of it against you. They know what they're doing even if no one else can see it. Don't believe their lies. They will try to hide it and excuse it away. Everyone else might even believe them, but you don't have to.
I help survivors of narcissistic abuse reclaim their independence and manage their minds. Healing is inevitable when you have the right tools and support.
If you’ve found one narcissist in your life, you’ve probably discovered others. It seems like everyone is a narcissist after we discover the first one. There’s usually truth in this, even if not everyone around us is one. You’re not crazy for feeling this way. Allow yourself the time and space to decipher who is and who is not. Then remove and distance yourself as best you can from the remaining toxic people.
Peace is not something most of us automatically accept after toxic relationships. It’s something we have to work on accepting and embracing. Little by little we create more peace and are able to accept more peace. It’s a process and a practice, not an event that happens. Do the work so you can embrace the peace you deserve!
Learning to trust our intuition again or for the first time is not easy to do. We often know what to do, but we are busy and distracted which doesn’t give us time and space to allow our intuition to guide us. Take the time and space to learn to allow the answers to surface and process the emotions.
I help survivors of narcissistic abuse reclaim their independence and manage their minds. Healing is inevitable when you have the right tools and support.
If they can't find reasons to isolate you from everyone in your life. They will make things up. They can't allow you to have a relationship with anyone that may allow you to see through the illusion they have created. They will stop at nothing. Doing the work to heal and keep supportive people in our lives is essential!
Most of us were never taught how to deal with and process our thoughts and emotions. Society doesn’t help with it either. These are skills anyone can learn and they are essential. Not just to feel better or be happier, but to be able to embrace all of the good things and the life we’re building.
Peace and calm often feels unsafe after living in chaos and abuse. We get conditioned that peace is simply the calm before the storm. This becomes normal for us. Healing work helps us to let go of the chaos and begin embracing peace. We don’t just heal to feel better, but to let the good in too!
Building and holding healthy boundaries is essential. I realize this is not simple or easy. In some relationships it may be nearly impossible. However, I believe in almost every relationship we can begin setting boundaries. This may lead to the end of the relationship because we are no longer good supply to them. This is the best thing we can do in most situations, even though it’s hard.
