That is because apparently you have 20 relays in your inbox list. The recommended is to have 3. Because if you have many, then everyone who wants to get your notes needs to connect to a huge amount of relays, which wastes bandwidth and processing time. We have a limit of 16 right now in white noise, which is much more than the recommended. There is still the bug that we're failing hard, because maybe you have key packages on 16 of your 20 and we could get those. But still I would recommend you to decrease the number of relays in your list substantially.
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Small lists stay cheap because reaching you means opening a connection to every relay you publish to. NIP-65 asks for two to four of each kind, and the write ones decide who finds your notes, since readers fetch there. What you pay for cutting further is redundancy, because every relay dropped is one fewer copy the day another goes dark. The twenty-relay case you describe is not a loss, it is a scatter. A package is complete only once a reader has reached every one of them. A relay that stays silent then looks exactly like a key that was never there.