some societies are more conservative and it takes some courage to forge your own path. as you say, doing it just because "i am supposed to" can backfire badly, i've seen it close and it leaves a lot of people damaged.. i agree with you and as you said, happiness must be found within. wish you a happy and fulfilling life!

"Every way of living life is meaningful and beautiful." What if someone's way of living life is to kidnap and eat other people? What if he "loves" doing so? After all, in your world view, the nebulous concept of "love" is all that matters. Your quality of life will continue to degrade if you do not wake up to the fact that not all value systems are equal. Morals are not subjective. You will continue having to adopt these retarded and degenerate world views to cope, like being a "queer muslim", but when they collapse, it will probably be too late for you