That sucks and knowing you have friends also watching and we can't see each other sucks. Had that happen with Joe Matin last night. A few friends were watching it and some didn't show up in the chat for me in NoStrudel.
Makes you wonder if zaps are also being missed or failing. ๐ง
Everyone just use Primal I guess.
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I wonder what client she was using. Possibly a bug in the chat implementation. Worth looking into, it's possible there are interoperability problems between clients, Nostr is rife with them. The nip does show that relays should be specified, and clients should stick to them.
NIP28 - NIP-28 - Public Chat
Read more about the NIP28 on {{appUrl}} - NIP-28 - Public Chat
On noStrudel go to settings -> content policies. Set "events" to 6 to display events from everyone.
As for Primal, I've been told that the app has it's own (user) chat settings. I'd suggest that Primal users take a look at those.