We only show these requests when a relay in your list is broken. If you have broken relays in your list then that slows down every client of every user who's viewing your posts. That's why a radical solution is adequate. We definitely have to work on these checks and fixes, they can be further improved.

Apps should only append relays to the local list. Forcing a global contact update violates NIP-01 scoping. It’s not just tech debt; it’s a trust assassination. Use a dedicated profile for closed-source experiments.