A year ago today... Rushed to the ER for the first time in my life. Morphin had never felt so good. First time to ever enter my veins too. Was incredibly impressed by the ER staff...
It was within half an hour of a ultrasound I'd come in for just two days before that I began experiencing pain. I'd gone in for that ultrasound curious to look into my fertility. (Just realizing now, I don't actually know what the test results showed. Never got access. Life has been hard to survive ever since that day. Some real low moments... Lowest I've had to ever face I'm pretty sure and pull myself up and out into the other side 🥺🤧)
What I know is that within half an hour before I even got home I started to have sharp pain in my stomach... that did not go away all day...
Eventually I was in a fetal position and in the most excrutiating pain I've ever had in my life. I do not know why, or I don't want to look at the why at all (there are a couple reasons) but even a year later I still haven't had the bandwith to process why I did not rush myself to the ER until day 3 of being hunched over in bed in pain while in the later stage realizing this could be and praying it ain't an appendix situation.
Here, I was in the hospital after admitted into ER and eventually left for observation overnight. The surgeon had wanted to operate and remove my apendix. But he'd also told me that he isn't sure if the liquid seen in the CT scan is the bursted ovarian cyst that apparently was reported after my ultra sound or if it is the appendix that also showed a couple poop like stones and would eventually need to be addressed anyways. The two were essentially almost glued to each other and he was having a hard diferentiating and my white blood count was doing well indicating my body is handling it well. So he could not confirm an appendix. The burst cyst liquid would eventually be reabsorbed by the body but if r was appendix surgery would be needed. Both could be equally painful. I was emphatic NO on surgery and removing an organ if there wasn't 100% certainty.
Well, morning blood work called for an emergency ruptured appendix surgery. Apparently it was very bad from what I heard by the male nurse who first assisted me once I was brought back to my roo. After the surgery and someone tended to me... But he was not even on my support team and a stranger to me helping out my nurse. I made a big deal about that specifically due to him unloading scary gory sounding details in the first moments of regaining consciousness after what was a serious life threatening operation. It's like he was just looking to have a friendly casual conversation like we were both waiting in line at the coffee shop or something.
I'd never been under the knife or had anaesthesia before.
I do remember already laying on a cold metal table and about to be put to sleep and realizing I could actually not wake up and die during what's about to follow. I thought, I have like 300 sats to my name but I haven't set up my inheritance. That could potentially be generational wealth for my great nieces and/or nephews down the road.
I felt like I wanted to write a note if something happened to me to my family all the way across the pond and give some kind of direction to claim my sats. Nurse was like "...Too late. Nothing will happen to you and put me to 😴".
I do remember waking up to the most gorgeous male nurse face who rolled me out of the surgery room. Not sure how many hours later. There was a moment in the days following, I felt like maybe this could be auspicious and I had an inkling to find his name.
I never saw my surgeon again. He'd left on vacation. I insisted talking to him on the phone. He explained they had to wash my entire insides with litters of liquid all the way from my breast bone to my pubic bone to ensure no puss pockets and infection remain.
I was for the most part alone and on my own 😭😭😭
This was also within days of the Virgo Eclipse at 28 degrees falling exactly on my Virgo IC at 28 degrees.
I am grateful to be alive 😭🤧🙏🏻🕊️❤️🔥🌹🌞
