you're not wrong. Lightning makes it a bit harder. the easiest options for controlling your own keys with Lightning is to use the "node in your phone" solutions from Breez,
@ZEUS z
@OpenSecret , Phoenix, or Blixt. These are by the far easiest self custody options, but using these comes with a bit of a trade-off because you are not managing the node or the channels or the liquidity as much, you're letting the application and service provider do this for you. Therefore, these options all come with various fee rates for sending and receiving sats over Lightning.
The harder method, the one that I personally have done for 3+ years, is to run your own Lightning node on a dedicated piece of hardware or server. You're in charge of the channels and liquidity. I won't lie, it's a pain in the ass. However, I don't have to pay fees to any provider.
As for tutorials, I always recommend my man
@BTC Sessions and the videos on his YouTube channel.
