Hey I am not technical Person but I have one question
The Private encrypted message stored on relay right so with the help of npub a person who is in charge of relay can find out who messaged who , like worst case scenario a social map can be created
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It's a note app, not a messaging one, so there isn't any risk.
Anyway, Nostr NIP-17 private messages use gift wraps (NIP-59), so they don't leak any metadata.
One more note: a relay operator cannot know anything more than a casual person that access the relay.