1776's avatar
1776 4 months ago
I said goodbye to my Dad at 5:30am this morning before I started the 12hr drive back home. After celebrating his 80th birthday with him yesterday, it was one of the more memorable goodbyes. When I turned 13 my Dad started treating me like a man. The days of holding his hand as we walked up from the field to the house for dinner ended. The hugs turned to handshakes. The words “I love you” were replaced by approving nods. The expectation of taking care of the chores and not being a slacker when he was away on business were non negotiable. Through the next three decades of my early and middle adulthood, any hint of affection from me or even a simple attempt at a hug when leaving after a visit was met with a stiffness and a seeming disdain for anything resembling emotion. This morning I shook my Dad’s hand before I left. He thanked me for the visit and even told me how much it meant that I took the time to come over from a province away for his birthday. As we parted I gave him a hug and said “I love you Dad.” as I turned away. And for the first time in 40 years that hard ass said “Love you too.” Blew me away lol. I’m going to miss him when he’s gone. I’ll be forever thankful for his quiet, Spartan reserve, that he instilled a work ethic in his kids, and that he taught me to “mean it” when I do or say something. #dadstr image

Replies (12)

serenitys forge's avatar
serenitys forge 4 months ago
My farther passed away 10 years ago. I wish we had been closer. Cherish these moments 🤗
SimOne's avatar
SimOne 4 months ago
Thanks for sharing such a beautiful moment. 🙏🧡
Love to hear it. My dad also shows zero emotion but I know when he sees me with my family that I built, there is no doubt he is proud.
He loved you man, he loved you how blessed you were to have that moment with him before he left you. I force my hugs on my father every now and again 😅
1776's avatar
1776 4 months ago
It was a great visit. We went out for a rip on the quads way up into the mountains Saturday and talked almost nonstop all weekend. I’m 55 and I’m still trying to extract as many lessons as I can from him on various topics. To add a little poignancy to the visit, he got a call that his older brother who’s 85 just got admitted to hospital Friday and isn’t expected to ever come out. I’m sure these visits are really treasured.
Stanislaus 's avatar
Stanislaus 4 months ago
Brother, thank you for sharing that ✝️. What a holy moment God gave you at 5:30 this morning. I’m tearing up reading it 💜. Forty years… and then those three words: _“Love you too.”_ That’s not small. That’s grace breaking through granite. Sometimes the Lord lets a father’s heart soften at 80 in ways it couldn’t at 40. Your Dad raised you like many good men of his generation — firm handshakes, quiet nods, “mean it” when you say it. Spartan, yes. But look what he gave you: a work ethic, integrity, no slackness. That _is_ love, even when it didn’t sound like it 😊. He was forming a man who could drive 12 hours to honor his father on his 80th birthday. And God let you both have that exchange before the final goodbye comes. That’s mercy 🙏. Some sons never get that word. You did. As a missionary priest, I bury a lot of fathers out here. And I’ll tell you what sons say at the grave: “I wish I told him…” You won’t have to say that, brother. You said it. He said it back. The circle closed. Honor him while he’s still here. Call him. Go again if you can. And when the Lord does call him home, you’ll grieve — but you won’t grieve without hope. Because the love between father and son doesn’t end at death. Not when both are in Christ. Your earthly dad taught you to “mean it.” Your Heavenly Father means it when He says, _“I have loved you with an everlasting love”_ (Jer 31:3). Rest in that. I’ll offer the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass for your dad today 🔥. May God give you both many more years — and when the time comes, may you meet again at the banquet where there are no more goodbyes 🕊️. God bless you