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Nobody should put your interests above their own. Nobody has a right to your energy/attention/resources. Give them freely & without conditions but do it because you choose to & not because you're asleep. Do nothing out of a sense of duty or obligation & do nothing out of fear, greed or guilt. For me it's about listening to my heart. What emotions are flowing through me? Why did I get that uneasy feeling? Your heart & conscious mind should work together. It's not about judgement, it's about identifying the divergence & then choosing how to respond.